


Pensieve

by sunnyjolras



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Harry Potter Setting, Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, Angst, Bullying, Fluff, In which the author goes very philosophical about the HP universe, M/M, Minor Character Death, Phandom Big Bang, Prejudice, Warnings: anything to do with the HP universe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-04
Updated: 2015-10-04
Packaged: 2018-04-24 20:40:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 9
Words: 36,236
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4934509
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunnyjolras/pseuds/sunnyjolras
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dan suddenly notices him in the crowd. He isn’t hard to spot, at least to Dan; he can read Phil like the back of his hand even when he doesn’t look like himself. He’s made himself look younger, red hair and freckles. Green eyes stare back into his brown ones, and for a second Phil’s usual features work themselves over his face. Cerulean blue eyes. Black hair. Skin that reminds Dan of that Muggle fairy tale Snow White Phil once read to him. They disappear just as soon after. Dan looks down to see the familiar wand in Phil's hand. </p><p>He looks ready for battle - oh.</p><p>Oh no.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Year 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the Slytherins are sent to the dungeon, a certain Ravenclaw decides to fight in the battle, and the flashbacks begin.

~~~

"Actually, Mr. Filch, your timing is impeccable. Could you please escort Miss Parkinson, and the rest of Slytherin house out."

"Where exactly will I be leading them to, ma’am?"

"The dungeons should do."

Dan freezes, looking wide eyed at Professor McGonagall. No, no no no. Surely she would know better! Despite the cheering of the other houses -the hoots and jests of their students all laughing about the Slytherins finally being treated like they deserved, finally as what they all believe about them, evil- his gasp is still audible. He looks wildly around, and sees that there are people who are not clapping. The DA. They know him. They know he is on their side.

Dan is a Slytherin, however. In many eyes, he may as well be a Death Eater.

His wide eyes are still as Filch starts to escort them to the dungeon. He can’t even cry out, no one would even hear him, his proclaims that he wants to stay and fight against the actual evil would just be lost in the din of the crowd. Even if they were heard, would people even believe him?

He knows that so many of his house aren’t bigoted, aren’t Death Eaters, or aren’t even affiliated.

But there _are_ Death Eaters in his house; that Pansy Parkinson is one, and she’s the cause of all his bloody troubles right now, so that’s all that matters, apparently. Getting rid of a whole house because a quarter of them are potentially the enemy in disguise. He turns his head back sharply. A silent plea, a call for help with no words, but no one responds. Really, why would they, with the imminent battle looming over everyone's heads?

(Dan doesn't want to think it, but come on. There are going to be Death Eaters storming the castle at any moment now, and it has been decided that they are to be in the dungeon during the attack. Is being a Slytherin worth more than his life?)

He turns his head again, sweeping over the Ravenclaws with his lip between his teeth. _He's not there, Dan,_ he thinks to himself. _Why would he be? He's supposed to be in hiding, under the premise that he fled the castle. He's not stupid, he'd have left._

Wrong.

Dan suddenly notices him in the crowd. He isn’t hard to spot, at least to Dan; he can read Phil like the back of his hand even when he doesn’t look like himself. He’s made himself look younger, red hair and freckles. Green eyes stare back into his brown ones, and for a second Phil’s usual features work themselves over his face. Cerulean blue eyes. Black hair. Skin that reminds Dan of that Muggle fairy tale Snow White Phil once read to him. They disappear just as soon after. Dan looks down to see the familiar wand in Phil's hand.

He looks ready for battle - oh.

_Oh no._

Phil looks at Dan sadly, shakes his head and mouths the dreaded words at him. _"I'm sorry. Be safe."_

_"I love you."_

Over the marching footsteps, in the midst of the hollers of the other students as Dan and his housemates are pushed out of the hall, his whispered reply is not heard.

_"Phil."_

~~~

The loud toot of a horn echoed throughout the platform, steam billowing up into the sky. The Hogwarts Express, in all its glory, 10 minutes from departure.

It was the first time Dan had ever seen it, and he was practically bouncing. Eleven years old, going into his first year of Hogwarts.

"Mum!" He exclaimed gleefully, turning to look at his mother. Her hair was pulled back into a messy bun and her kind eyes were rimmed with red. Dan knew she had been up late last night fretting over him. It was always hard for a mother to part with her child.

"Mum, look, it's so cool!"

She smiled, "It is. Oh Dan, you're going to have the time of your life there. I know I did." She crouched down. "Honey, listen. I know your Grandfather told you that Slytherin was the best house."

She paused, closing her eyes. Dan’s paternal grandfather was sometimes a cold man, vicious with his words. A real bigot, the type that looked down upon Muggle-borns and owned numerous house elves. Not that Dan would know, he only ever saw the side of his grandfather that doted on him, spoiling him with presents on his birthday and every Christmas.

"That's not the case though. Make friends, especially with people from other houses. Stay kind. If you do end up in Slytherin-"

Dan gave a chuckle. He knew the odds. Coming from a long line of Slytherins, it would be unusual for him to be anything else.

His mother just rolled her eyes. "If you do end up in Slytherin," she repeated, "Don't listen to anyone who says that your bloodline makes you superior. Understand?"

"Yes, mum," he nodded. His father had told him so too, but Dan had never understood why. A wizard was a wizard, a witch a witch. Who cared if they came from Muggles?

Another horn blasted through the station, and Dan bolted upright. His mother hugged him, and he wrapped his arms around her and squeezed in reply.

Time passed quickly, and soon Dan was in a compartment to himself. His trunks were in the overhead compartment, his owl Suki next to him, hooting in her cage.

There was a knock on the door.

Dan looked up, and got out some money. It must have been the trolley lady. He was definitely in the mood for some chocolate frogs. "Yeah?" He responded.

It was not the trolley lady.

A boy, just a little shorter than himself, came stumbling in. He had bright blue eyes and dark hair. Pushing up his glasses, he gave Dan an awkward smile. "Uh... Hi! I'm Phil, and I need somewhere to sit? Can I...?" He gestured around wildly, and Dan laughed at his absurdity.

"Yeah, yeah. Come on in."

The boy, Phil, grinned. He grabbed his luggage and put it above in the compartment. It wasn't a normal trunk, and Dan recognised it as a Muggle contraption. A suitcase? Ah. A Muggle-born.

"My names Dan. Daniel Howell." He subconsciously stated his last name like it was important, having been brought up by a family, bar his parents, that assured him that his Pureblood status meant power.

"Oh, I'm Philip Lester. But, please don't call me Philip. Just Phil." He smiled once again, before noticing the owl. "Cool! You have an owl for a pet?"

"Yeah, they're actually pretty common. I'm guessing you're a Muggle-born?"

"Mu-" he stammered, "Muggle? Muggle-born?" Phil drew his eyebrows together, frowning.

"Oh. It means you're a wizard coming from people who, uh, aren't. They're called Muggles."

Phil gave a nod, and mentally wrote that down. "Then... Yeah, I am. We got this letter a month ago, and we thought it was a joke. But five more came - all by owl too that's so cool, right?- before this teacher arrived. His name's Professor Flitnick, or something. Anyway, he explained everything and here I am." He gave a little giggle. "It makes a lot of sense though, my parents always wondered how my hair kept changing colour, as well as my eyes."

Dan widened his eyes. "Woah! You're a Metamorphmagus?!"

"Yeah!" Phil smiled. "Apparently my great, great, great, great or whatever grandmother was or something. That professor did call me that. It's rare too, from what I've heard."

"Extremely. Especially being a Muggle-born. Show me!"

Phil looked at Dan expressionlessly, before he smirked. Blonde flowed through his hair, coming from his roots and colouring downwards. "Apparently I can make myself look completely different, but I haven't figured how yet. I've only just learnt to do that, before I trained myself my hair and eyes would just change shades depending on my mood."

"That's still amazing!" Dan laughed breathlessly, grinning at Phil. "The only other Metamorphmagus I know about is the granddaughter of my grandfather's friend. Her name's Nymphadora, but I've never met her. I've actually never seen one before. "

"Well, now you have. Pleased to be the first," Phil teased in reply, leaning back.

Conversation flowed easily after that. Turns out the professor -one that Dan knew to actually be called Flitwick, and corrected Phil quickly so he wouldn't make the same mistake- hadn't explained much about Hogwarts. Phil's knowledge extended to: 'It's a school of magic, and I'm a wizard and I have a wand.', and Dan dived face first into the task to explain wizarding life for Phil.

They explored topics of the wizarding world, of Diagon Alley, and Phil's adventure filled trip there. Phil had already read some of the books they had been asked to buy for their studies, and had bought some more for him to catch up on wizarding life. They talked of magical beasts and how Phil 'couldn't believe unicorns are actually real, that's insane and are you telling me dragons are too?'.

(Dan would have laughed, but he had equal amounts of surprise and disbelief both in his voice and on his face upon learning about Muggle inventions- surely something called a 'telephone' couldn't be real, what spell did it use?)

They also talked about Hogwarts, Dan having to explain the four houses to him. ('So Helga Hufflepuff was seriously the only one out of the four to say that everyone who could learn magic, should? Could the other three be considered discriminatory? I mean, I get it, but why?')

The conversation was not hard fought for. It came easily and flowed smoothly, and they were learning more and more about each other as the seconds passed, easily the most effortless conversation either of them had ever had.

And it was when Dan bought some Bertie Botts' Every Flavour Beans and some other snacks -after recommending some to Phil for him to try as well as explaining the currency to him- and ate a bogey flavoured one the same time Phil swallowed a bright yellow one he hoped would be caramel but turned out to be cheese, the fact that they had the exact same shuddering gag and matching giggles afterwards showed Dan that he had truly made his first friend at Hogwarts.

~~~

The memory from just under six years ago runs clear in Dan's mind as he is marched down the stairs. He tries to turn back but the sneering glare of a specific fourth year that Dan knew very well had Death Eaters for parents makes him turn around. He reaches out for his friend, Cat, and slows down just slightly to walk alongside her. They mirrored each other, heads lowered, eyes wet, voices silent.

The dungeon had always been comforting before. Being his dormitory, Dan had grown up in Hogwarts engulfed by the walls under the lake that never seemed to be cold, seeing the creatures swim past as he closed his eyes every night to sleep as his personal, twisted lullaby. Now, the dormitory is their prison, and Dan has absolutely no desire to be there.

They come to the sliding brick wall, and Filch whispers the password. Dan scoffs at how laughable the situation is. The password’s been ‘ _pure-blood_ ’ since the school year -if it can even be called that- started, but there isn’t anything he wouldn’t give to not be a Slytherin right now.

They file silently, hesitantly, into the common room. All the fires inside have gone out. The big windows keeping the lake out also keep the light away. The black couches Dan used to love for the aesthetic appeal now resemble prison barracks to him.

He tries to fight to go back up, but Filch merely glares at him before locking the door. “Don’t bother trying to get out. And the dorms are off limits.”

Filch leaves, Mrs. Norris meowing just to mock them and here he is, trapped behind one side of a door, while the love of his life is preparing for battle with the DA on the other.

Despite the nature of the stereotypes of each house, the best qualities of his house manifested themselves in Phil. Stupid, kind hearted Phil, wanting to fight so other people can have a better life. Reckless, warm Phil, wanting revenge against the Death Eaters that had caused him _so, so much pain_ , for being Muggle-born. Smart, beautiful Phil, ready to fight with his friends to defeat the evil that has plagued him ever since he found out he was a wizard. Dan is sure he’s about to lose him.

But Dan wants to fight for the same reason. He understands Phil, but for the same reason he needs Phil to flee. Phil can't fight without Dan by his side, he wouldn't survive. They’re a team, a double act. They help each other. How would Phil last in a duel without him? How would Dan survive on this side of the door if his boyfriend lay motionless, and cold-

(oh, so cold, what would his eyes look like without that life in them, would they look as blue as they are, as they always were, or would they be grey and cold like his hands would turn if he was to fall)

\- amongst the bodies that would amass.

As Cat wraps his arms around him, he starts to cry. Merlin knows he is powerless to do anything else.

~~~

"Dan!"

He turned around sharply and grinned at Phil running towards him. At first he could hardly see him, a blur entering the courtyard. Dan put down his Herbology textbook. He was pleasantly surprised, thinking Phil had gone to that Quidditch match, but obviously he hadn’t. Phil was now close enough to actually see. His hair was wild and his glasses haphazard, with his robe only half on and his Ravenclaw scarf fluttering behind him.

It was the expression on Phil's face that made Dan's grin falter.

"Woah, Phil, what's wrong?"

"Th-There's b-been an-nother attack-k." Phil gulped breathlessly, his eyes brimming with tears. Pure fear was etched onto his face, as if Dan was a boggart, or if he was looking into the dark expanse of the deep sea, and he was doomed to drown. "There's been two! Dan. I-It was Herm-mione G-Granger, and. And P-Penelope Clearwater!" He managed to stutter, before tears overflowed and he buried himself into Dan's shoulder.

Dan's reaction was immediate. His arms snaked around Phil's shoulders and he led him away into hiding.

Shit.

Despite their trauma, it was a sunny May afternoon, the heat was almost suffocating. They were well into their first year in Hogwarts, but it was nothing like Dan had expected it to be. Namely, he hadn't expected finding someone like Phil and he definitely hadn't expected to be thrust into a world where Muggle-borns were falling left and right.

_(They were sat in the library, Phil looking around nervously. He had become a lot more jittery after the attack on Colin Creevey, a friend that Phil made in his Transfiguration class, and was constantly on the lookout. Dan didn't blame him._

_"Dan?" Phil mumbled, turning to him slowly. "Can I ask a question?"_

_Dan nodded. "Of course you can."_

_"Why is it only Muggle-borns being attacked? You seem to understand but I'm completely confused. That graffiti... Are we really all the enemies of the heir?"_

_Dan sighed, grimacing at the question. "It's not a pretty answer Phil. You're going to get upset."_

_The laugh Phil gave was bitter, full of oncoming tears. "I'm already upset! I could be attacked, Dan. I could be petrified, or even killed. I want to know at least why this person is out to get people like me."_

_Dan paused, looking up to the ceiling for a moment, before his gaze fell onto Phil’s face. Cold, unwavering, full of determination and curiosity. Fucking Ravenclaws._

_Dan told him.)_

"It's going to be okay, Phil." Dan whispered, but the half hearted attempt at comfort fluttered through both of them.

Their situation _really_ had the potential to not be okay.

Dan sat them both down, Phil curling up next to him in the shadows of the cloisters. "They're going to find the culprit soon, and I talked to Professor Sprout again today. The mandrakes are almost ready!"

"It's not Harry Potter." Phil whispered solemnly. The sudden change in topics and tone, as well as the complete and utter disregard for Dan's sentence caught Dan off guard. He soon gathered what Phil meant.

_(“I’m telling you, it’s not him!”_

_Dan turned to Phil, laughing a little. He was trying to do his Charms homework, but in reality getting nowhere. He was much better at Herbology and Potions, so he had asked Phil -who seemed to have a penchant for Charms and Defence against the Dark Arts, as well as Transfiguration- to help him. The conversation had soon dissolved. Dan had tried his best to distract Phil from the attacks by concentrating on schoolwork, but he was devastated after Colin’s attack. Colin was one of the few friends Phil had made besides Dan, and now that a week had passed Justin Finch-Fletchley’s attack, whispers had begun about who would be next._

_“Phil. Number one, he can speak Parseltongue. Normally only the very experienced dark wizards can. Two, a day after he shows us he can speak the language of snakes, that Hufflepuff gets attacked. Coincidence?”_

_“But… But look! He hangs around with Hermione Granger, she’s a Muggle-born too. You told me that the attacker would hate Muggle-borns… y’know, call them. God, call them-”_

_Dan cut Phil off. “Yeah, I know what you’re getting at, but-”_

_“But what? He obviously doesn’t hate Muggle-borns… My dad’s a lawyer, did y’know? He once told me that you can’t do anything without motive.”_

_“Understood, but how do you know that the Granger girl-”_

_“Hermione.”_

_“-Yeah, her, how do you know she’s not just a ruse? Or the sole exception? I can almost guarantee you that if Potter’s the culprit, she won’t be attacked. He likes her too much._ Anyway _, can you get back to helping me with this homework? Flitwick will have my neck if I don’t hand it in on time.”_

_Phil rolled his eyes but shuffled closer to the desk anyway. “Of course, but only if you help me with my History of Magic homework. 11 inches about the International Wizard convention of 1289, kill me now.”)_

"Oh shit... Yeah, you're right. He would never have attacked the Granger girl."

"I told you." Phil groaned. "And now there are no leads. We're back to square one." There was a lengthy pause. "Everyone in my tower says that it has to be a Slytherin. The heir of Slytherin, see, it makes sense. Other people are saying that... That all Slytherins only care if people are- are _Pureblood_ -" Phil spat that word out, glaring down at his lap. He didn't finish his sentence, but Dan got the gist.

 _("That word... That stupid word. How_ dare _someone have the right to say I'm any less pure because of who I am.")_

Phil coughed, before looking back up to Dan. "You don't, do you Dan? You don't think any less of me, right?"

The hand that wasn’t wrapped around Phil clenched into a fist. “Why… Why are you asking that? Why would I ever?”

Phil merely curled up further against Dan, wiping his eyes furiously. Dan just felt so confused, this was the first time Phil had ever doubted their friendship. They had been inseparable since that very first train ride. Despite being in different houses, they had spent all their free hours together ever since the sorting and never seemed to get tired of each other.

_(“Howell, Daniel.”_

_Dan stepped up to the podium slowly, turning back to glance at Phil who was staring around the Great Hall in admiration, obviously a Muggle-born. He looked so serene, so happy to look up at the ceiling that reflected the sky. If getting a wand wasn't enough, it had just sunk in for him that this was all_ real _. Dan smiled to himself, glad to have made a friend already. He couldn’t wait to write to his parent’s and talk about the friend he already knew so much about._

_He reached the front, and with that, sat down on the stool. He caught Phil’s eye, who was now watching again. Somehow his eyes were dark blue, but Dan doubted he even noticed. It was probably to do with how he was feeling. Phil gave him a wide smile, and a thumbs up._

_It was then when the Sorting Hat fell over his eyes._

_It took all of 30 seconds for the Hat to make a decision. It considered Gryffindor for a fleeting moment, something about bravery and recklessness, but in the end a loud_ “Slytherin!” _reverberated throughout the hall._

_There was a loud cheer from the far right of the hall, and Dan shakily stood up and joined them. A Slytherin, Merlin, he was in Hogwarts! He received a few claps on the shoulder, and after saying ‘hi’ to a few people, he turned back to the front of the hall and once again made eye contact with Phil. Phil was smiling sadly at him. Dan knew why. The chances of them getting in the same house was slim._

_Dan mouthed at Phil._ “Don’t worry. We’ll have lessons together!”

 _Phil merely laughed, and gave a thumbs up. People were going up and getting sorted, but neither of them were paying attention. Phil smiled._ “Talk to me tomorrow?” _He mouthed back. Dan nodded._

_“Lester, Philip.”_

_Phil turned around sharply from the shock, and his black hair became chestnut brown. He shook himself out of it, and practically skipped up to the stool and eagerly awaited the hat. Dan laughed at the silliness, but guessed that this was all new and exciting for him and he knew that if he was in Phil’s shoes then he would do the exact same._

_The hat remained there for a minute and twenty seconds before the cry of “_ Ravenclaw!” _was heard._

_The cheer echoed from the table next to Dan, and Dan thanked every deity that was perhaps out there that he had chosen a seat on the aisle side of the table. Henceforth, Phil strategically placed himself opposite to Dan across the aisle. He caught his eye and gave a tiny wave. Phil giggled before waving back, then turned to greet his new housemates._

_At some point Dan ended up sitting next to Phil on the Ravenclaw table, and then ended up sitting with him every night afterwards and none of the Ravenclaws had ever questioned it since.)_

“Phil…”

“I-I was at the Quidditch match.” Phil whispered, Dan having to apply his full attention just to hear him, let alone associate the words. “I knew you wouldn’t be there, ‘cause you think Quidditch is boring even though people _fly on brooms_. I was with a few people from my house, and we sat by a few Slytherins. McGonagall ran onto the pitch, and when she… she announced the news, a few of these Slytherins just _laughed_. They were the same Slytherins that have-uh… never mind. I know that other people from their house told them to be quiet, but it scared me so much to even think that you could potentially think the same… because I’m a _mudblood_ -”

“Don’t you _ever_ call yourself that.” Dan growled, commandeering Phil by grabbing his shoulders and forcing Phil to look him in the eye and not say another utterance. “You are not a-a mudblood,” he spat, “You are a wizard. I would never think of you as anything less than amazing.”

Phil nodded and wrapped his arms around Dan’s waist, hugging him tightly. “I know… I don’t mean to take this out on you, but I’m just so scared. I just ran all the way here from the stadium, to find you. I snuck out. Everyone else is still there. Oh god, I’m so scared. What am I going to do, Dan?”

Dan frowned. “I don’t know, Phil. We’re just going to have to deal with this.” He said truthfully.

Phil nodded. “You’re right. I’m sorry.”

“You know what? Let’s sneak up to the library and hide out there. I have a feeling they’re going to be a lot more strict now. We can read about dragons, I know how interested you are in them.”

Phil couldn’t help but give Dan a watery smile. “Have I ever told you how amazing you are? You’re the best friend in the world.”

Dan’s heart fluttered, and a warm smile snuck up on himself as it came to rest on his face. “Of course.” Dan helped Phil up, and lay a hand on Phil’s waist to hurry him quickly along to the library.

“Hey Phil? What did you say about those Slytherins being the same ones that had…?”

“O-oh, that really doesn’t matter.”

“‘Kay. If you're sure.”


	2. Year 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which a Slytherin encounters the enemy in a prison cell, there's new year of memories both good and bad, and there's panicking in the present.

~~~

Cat’s whispered words of comfort do nothing. Dan feels his heart break over and over again as he sobs violently into her shoulder. Soon, he feels another hand on him, knowing it would be Tom. He leans into them both, his breathing becoming laboured.

“I’ve just checked. The doors to the dorms are gone,” Tom whispers to them, “It’s just brick walls all the way around us now. There’s no way out. Just like a prison cell.”

Dan looks around. Some of the younger students are crowding around the dark fireplace, there are others sitting by the big window to the lake, and over there...

“Fucking mudbloods, did you hear them in the hall? When the Dark Lord wins, I hope they all die. They’re fucking disgraces.”

Dan's head jerks around, as if some invisible force just grabbed his hair and yanked hard. His eyes land on a group of Slytherins in the corner furthest from the door. He then notices just how clearly the room has divided itself. Most are on the same half as Dan, but those few across the room are huddling, almost as if coiled together. Ah, the Death Eaters.

The same people that bullied Phil in their first and second years.

Up in a flash, Dan storms up to the group and jabs his wand at them. Everything he had learned with the DA that year comes flashing back. Head held high, posture perfect. Ready for a duel.

“Don’t you fucking dare. Do not try me, you’re the reason I’m stuck down here.”

“Oh yes, of course a Blood Traitor like you would try to fight against it. You and your Mudblood boyfriend. Can’t you accept it, Howell? You’ve lost. You’re going to lose this battle against us.You and your precious ‘Dumbledore’s Army’.

“You’ve lost, and that Mudblood of yours will die.”

~~~

It was the end of their second year when Dan realised he had feelings for Phil.

In retrospect, it made a lot of sense. Too much sense actually. In fact, how had he not realised it before?

Phil had always been different. He had never felt the closeness he felt with Phil with his Slytherin friends Cat and Tom and Phil’s friend Colin; there was that _electricity_ between him and Phil. It was static. Sparks flew. They were almost always together, bar lessons and after curfew. They never got sick of each other, and it was like every moment just brought them closer and closer.

_(Dan’s laughter was growing more and more hysterical, tears forming in the corners of his eyes before he wiped them away. He feared Madame Pince would find them and remove them from the library, but he couldn’t stop laughing._

_Phil had changed his nose into the snout of a pig now, and oinked dramatically._

_The resounding laugh_ did _get them removed.)_

They were best friends, but… Dan wanted -needed- more.

They could be perfect together. In some ways, they already were. They could cheer each other up in seconds, they could make the other laugh hysterically, they already knew all the other person’s idiosyncrasies. They had almost two years of friendship behind them. Approximately 730 days of memories between them.

Their second year hadn’t been nearly as eventful as their first. Well, in terms of fear of death, then, hardly eventful at all.

Dan was quickly growing to become a great Herbologist, and Professor Sprout adored him. Phil had thrived under Professor Lupin’s teaching, as well as Professor Flitwick’s. He was great at spell work, and was gaining top marks in those classes. He quickly became everyone’s go to guy for a little homework help.

_(Phil stumbled into the library, and Dan only knew it was him because of his characteristic book bag. He was slowly coming to recognise Phil no matter his appearance, but it was a slow process. Phil was now blonde, with hair that was long and unkempt. He had pale eyes, either an incredibly light blue or a grey. He was more tan. Dan had known that he had been seeing his head of house and Professor Lupin to develop his powers, but this must have taken a lot of work. He looked completely different, like a stupidly, conventionally attractive surfer. People that Dan saw when he went on holiday to Cornwall two years ago._

_Phil sat down next to Dan, and smiled shyly. Okay, that was also new. Why was he acting so strangely?_

_“You alright, Phil? You...uh, you do realise you look differently.”_

_Phil blinked, flinched ever so slightly at the tone Dan used, and then nodded. “‘Course I do. Fancied a change, s’all.”_

_Dan frowned. “Where’ve you been? And why? You look completely fine normally.”_

_Phil groaned. “Nothing, just helping Clio with her Charms.”-That was truth- “A-and then I helped that guy Janus Grunnion with his Transfiguration homework.” Phil whispered. It was a lie. An incredibly believable lie, Janus being a dull headed guy in his dorm, but it was nonetheless a big lie. “Anyway!” Phil exclaimed suddenly, snapping his head to his bag to get out his book. “Let’s do some Herbology homework, ‘cause I have literally no idea about Mandrakes and what to do with them.”_

_Dan didn’t press it, since Phil had already changed the subject. He’d ask him later._

_He didn’t.)_

They were Dan and Phil, Phil and Dan. Rarely seen without the other. They weren’t the same, and in many aspects they were different, but they were complimentary. They enhanced each other, letting each other’s personalities shine through without compromise.

Of course, Dan just had to go and fall for him.

“Dan?” Phil asked, tugging on the sleeves of his woollen jumper to pull them over his hands. “You’re zoning out, are you alright?”

“F-Fine.” Dan stammered, before giving Phil a warm smile to reassure him. He tended to worry, so it was necessary to show that he was okay.

Phil smiled back and gripped the handle of his suitcase. “Good.”

They were standing at the the front of Hogwarts, waiting for the carriages to arrive. It was the end of the school year and so they had to return home for the summer. Dan was so, (impossibly, to the point where it defied all concepts of being to vocalise it) so reluctant to leave Phil, but they had already arranged with their parents to meet up up at various points during the summer. Phil would go over Dan’s and experience life living in the Wizard world, Dan would go over Phil’s -for an entire week!- to actually see what Muggle life was really like.

This he was incredibly excited for, because come on, apparently Muggles used _cars_ to get around. They were so fascinating.

The whole reason they had arranged this was because of the first time they had been separated for more than two weeks. Going home for Christmas last year had almost been unbearable, even though it was the first time they had been separated, and they had both returned early from the Easter holidays so they could be with each other. But that summer…

_(“Honey.” Dan’s mother said exasperated. “This moping needs to stop. You’ll see him in two weeks, and you’ve been writing letters almost constantly.”_

_“But it isn’t the_ same _.” Dan whined, Suki the owl hooting sadly as she flew around his room. He was sprawled across his bed, groaning into his pillow._

_Dan’s father chuckled from where he was leaning against the doorframe. “Leave him be, being away from your best friend is difficult, especially for this long.”_

_Dan nodded in agreement, his face never leaving the pillow. “See, Dad gets it.”_

_Dan’s father walked in. “I was the same, back when me and your mother became friends in fifth year. Inconsolable.”_

_It said something about Dan’s state of denial at this point that he didn’t even make the connection between his parent’s relationship and his own relationship with Phil._

_“Although, I could always use the floo powder network to visit your mother, with your Phil-” Your Phil, Merlin, even his parents knew at this point, how had he not realised sooner “-being a Muggle-born, we’d have to arrange with his parents to meet. We don’t, however, know them personally, so that’s going to make things even more difficult.” Suddenly, he looked to his wife and gave her a smirk before getting up. He soon returned with a plastic object, that Dan didn’t see at first as his eyes were squeezed shut and his face pressed roughly into the pillow._

_“So,” And now it was his mother’s turn to speak, and at her tone Dan couldn’t help but lift his face up and face her. She sounder promising, full of delight and teasing. “We’ve, well, your father talked to some people he knew from the Muggle Liaison office, and we decided to get you this.”_

_Dan’s father held out the object, and Dan sat up fully. He took the object in his hand. It was red, and smooth. Shiny. It was… plastic? Dan’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion, as he took it in. What was it? Was he even holding it the right way round? Dan turned it upside down, but as soon as he did, half of the object fell out, only connected by a spiralling cord. There was a faint buzzing noise coming from the fallen half, and when Dan picked it up -the object was easy to hold, like it had been designed to be- the sound only got louder. And now that this had come out of the object, a numberpad had appeared from under where it used to be. Numbers zero through to nine. What even?_

_“Wha- Uh… Thanks? Uh… okay, really, what is this? How will this help me?”_

_Dan’s mother shrugged. “I don’t really know myself, your father suggested it. He asked all around the office for you, and, well.... dear?”_

_There was a chuckle, before Dan’s father turned to Dan. “This is a… fellytone?”_

_“A tellyphon-e?!” Dan shot up, smiling widely. “This is a felly-no- telly, no, ah! Oh Merlin! Phil told me all about these! This… this is what Muggles use to communicate! Blimey, can I use this to talk with Phil?!”_

_“That’s the idea.” Dan’s father smiled, wrapping an arm around his wife’s waist, glad to see her so happy. “Now, from what I understand of it, you’re going to have to write a letter to Phil and ask for his number. You then put that in here, and then when you press this little button here-” He pointed to a green button “-and then it will… ring?… and then you’ll, uh, hear him? I don’t exactly know.”_

_“Oh my, ah, thank you!” Dan went in for a really big hug, wrapping his arms around the both of them. He suddenly stepped back. “I’m gonna ask him straight away. Suki!” Dan called, hearing the owl’s hoot in reply. “Get ready to go to Phil’s house.”_

_It was later that day when Suki returned, with a slip of paper with Phil’s scrawled handwriting (which was an enthusiastic reply stating that he was so excited for Dan’s call and that he was free all night so he could phone any time) coupled with a meticulously written set of numbers, obviously scribed out so there would be no confusion between numbers._

_Dan took the telephone in hand and picked up the object that was blocking the numberpad. He set that aside so he could input the numbers one by one. He did it slowly, so that he would make no mistakes. He pressed the green button._

_There was a pause, and the incredibly faint buzzing kept starting and cutting off. What was happening, why couldn’t he hear Phil? This wasn’t working! Dan sighed and was about to throw the object in frustration when he heard a faint_ “Hello? Dan?”

_Dan looked at the object in awe. Wow, this thing used no magic? This was incredible! “Phil? Oh my- holy Hippogriff, Phil, I can hear you.”_

“Dan? Dan are you there?”

_“Yes, Phil, I’m here.”_

“Dan, I can’t hear you, I- wait… You’ve never had a- you don’t know what you’re doing.”

_“Of course I know!” Dan exclaimed. “I can hear you! I did this myself.”_

“Are you even holding the phone? Or are you just talking at it? Okay, wow, my best friend’s an idiot. Right, Dan. Pick up the phone.”

_Dan frowned, and picked up the half of the object that held the keypad. “Like this? Can you hear me now?”_

“Dan? Okay, I still can’t hear y-. Oh. Oh my god, Dan. Do you have one of those landlines? Pick up the other end, you absolute pillock. The end where _my voice is coming out of._ ”

_Dan bit his lip and placed the larger object down, picking up the handle of the other. Okay, this was easier to hold, so it was probably right. “Okay?”_

“Have you done it? Okay, hold it so the top end is by your ear, and the bottom part- where the cord is coming out of- by your mouth.”

_Dan nodded, not remembering Phil couldn’t see him, and held it as instructed. “Phil?” He asked loudly._

“Jesus Christ, Dan, don’t shout!” _Phil’s voice was a lot louder, and he could hear his laugh. “_ Well, congratulations, you’ve just learnt how to use a telephone. I… I can’t believe you bought a telephone! You- you’re such an idiot. But, hello!” _There was a giggle._ “How are you?”

_Holy shit, Muggles really_ did _have magic. This was insane! He couldn’t wait to use it some more. So Dan lowered his voice, and replied._

_The conversation that resulted lasted two hours._

_The Lesters’ phone bill was a lot more grand that year. If that didn’t encourage them to contact Dan’s parents and invite Dan over for the next holidays, what would?)_

This year wouldn’t be anything close to how bad it was last summer. Of course, they could always meet up in Diagon Alley like they did during Christmas, but to be able to visit each other’s houses and spend time with one another during these holidays deserved a whole other level of excitement.

The carriages arrived, being pulled by nothing (Dan really wanted to know what enchantment they used), and Phil led them onto one with his friend Colin, a random Hufflepuff and another Ravenclaw- a girl reading the Quibbler with her wand behind her ear.

Phil smiled at Dan, and shuffled closer. He engaged him in conversation about how excited he was for Dan to come over in just over a week and a half. He told him about Muggle life, about having pictures that _didn't move_ and these things called _television screens_ that somehow did. He was smiling widely, gesticulating with his hands. He captivated the attention of the entire carriage, even the strange girl was looking at him with contemplative eyes.

A whole train ride later, they arrived at King’s Cross Station. Phil sighed, groaning as he got off of the train. “I don’t want to go home.” He whined. “A whole summer without being able to use magic, a week before you’re coming over. God, this is torture.”

Dan’s heart jumped. “I’ll see you soon,” He affirmed. It was sad to hear Phil convey these things, and know that he meant them completely platonically.

Dan could see his parents in the crowd, and he turned to Phil. “Right, I… It’s only a week.” He murmured. He bit his lip, before hugging Phil. “See you.”

Phil squeezed Dan ever so gently, before pulling away. “See you. Uh… Phone me! Bye!” He waved, before hugging Dan quickly once again. He scarpered off, rolling his trunk behind him so he could meet his parents.

He was so adorable.

God, Dan was so fucked. So so fucked.

~~~

Dan’s not really the duelling type. He’s a gardener, a herbologist. Phil helped him with nearly all his DADA homework. And yet, here he is, seething red, his wand a breath from that- that _Death Eater’s_ face.

“God, are you actually stupid? You are not going to win against me. Say another _fucking_ thing about Phil, go for it. Remember last time you crossed me? How was spending a week in a full body bind in the hospital wing? Try me, I’ll fucking murder you.”

“Dan.” Cat’s voice is small, but it slices through the wall of pent up rage surrounding him. The year has been hard. “It’s not worth it. There’s a real war going on outside.”

He sighs. She’s right, of course, but that doesn’t stop a whisper of a spell from escaping his lips.

“ _Stupefy_.”

Cat immediately casts her _Protego_ and pulls him back from the wall of raised wands. Tom runs up at that precise moment, and leads Dan back into the crowd. He needs to stay away from them.

No, he needs to get to Phil.

The crowd surrounds him, shielding him from the Death Eaters’ wands. Glancing around, he sees the angry faces, the sullen glares. Many are adopted a duelling stance. They aren’t as good as the DA, but they are ready.

People have them so wrong. They want to end the atrocities that surround them. Their house may be traditional, but that doesn’t mean they’re inherently evil.

~~~

Why was Phil like this? He was shying away, flinching at every touch. Not only that, but he remained as his usual self less and less. More often than not Dan was learning to associate Phil with blonde hair, stupidly tanned skin and a face that had most people staring in awe but Dan cringing in disgust.

When Phil came into the Great Hall for dinner, Dan saw his disguise for the fifth time in a row, and he broke.

"Phil." He snapped, having already been sitting at the Ravenclaw table. "We are talking afterwards. No buts."

Phil stepped back slightly in shock, but then demurely sank into his seat. He didn't comment, and remained silent for the rest of the meal.

(He hardly ate anything, merely picking at his bread and a bit of the chicken, and taking large sips of his water. What the hell was happening?)

Straight away, Dan marched Phil outside. He was an elixir of emotions, bubbling and overflowing. He looked straight ahead, but the glances he spared in Phil’s directions clearly showed him how emotionally distressed he was. His hair kept changing colour, flickering back and forth from his natural black, to blue, and red, and purple, and back to the blonde he usually was these days. Dan didn’t even want to see what Phil was doing to his face.

The lake was their natural hangout, but instead of sitting down on the bank and dipping their toes in, Dan turned sharply to Phil. He stood away from him, crossing his arms.

“Turn yourself back.”

Phil’s grey eyes widened, turned teary, before closing. He shook his head. “N-No!”

“Do it. Now.” Dan growled, glaring at Phil.

The Ravenclaw shook his head again, now shaking. “No… Dan, don’t make me do this, please!”

Dan shook his head, and took his wand out of his robe pocket. “I’m not playing around anymore, Phil. You are worrying the shit out of me, you’ve hardly looked like yourself for a month now! Show me what you look like or I swear on my life-”

Phil flinched back, and took a shaky breath.

His hair slowly coloured itself from the roots, and then he gradually changed his skin colour back to normal. It started from the tips of his fingers, and spread outward under his robes. His face was the last to change, and Dan almost sighed in relief that Phil was doing what he was told. It slowly moved towards his cheeks, and all seemed normal. Then the skin near his right eye turned red. Then blue. Purple. Then black. His eye had swollen so much that Dan couldn’t even see if his eye colour had changed back to normal. Then there was the cut on his forehead, the bruise on his left cheek.

If this is what had happened to his face, what had happened beneath his robes?

No, that wasn’t the question to be asking right now.

“Who did this to you?” Dan breathed, moving to check over Phil’s face for more injuries. There was another bruise hidden under Phil’s fringe.

Phil looked down, and Dan could see the exact moment he decided to admit everything. “A-A few people… mostly people from your house, but one from my own as well.”

Dan saw red, but composed himself. He was already formulating a plan, but Phil couldn’t catch on just yet. “How long?” He asked quietly.

If there was an answer that Dan wasn’t expecting, it was Phil saying: “A year.”

“A fucking year?!” Dan screeched, stepping back. “They’ve been doing this to you for a year? Why didn’t you tell me!”

Phil bit his lip, sniffing and turning away from Dan. “I-I… I didn’t want to worry you. It wasn’t anything big at first, just them calling me, y’know, _the word_ and stuff. Then it progressed to making me do their homework, and duelling with them. God, they started pulling out their wands every time they saw me. Then it was attacks on my appearance, and finally they started hitting me-”

“-a month ago.” Dan finished for him.

Phil nodded. “Yeah…”

“Phil, you should have told me.”

“I-I really didn’t want to… I’m sorry.”

“Oh blimey, this explains so much.”

“I guess. Look, I just… I don’t really want to talk about it.” Phil stepped back, and soon blonde hair and tanned skin reappeared. “Can you just… leave it? It’s not a big deal, seriously. Don’t tell anyone… I don’t want to imagine what they’d do if I got them into trouble.” Phil took another step back, fear etched onto his face. “Shit… why did I ever tell you? I- I gotta go. See you later.” Phil wiped his eyes, before running away.

Dan frowned, turned on his heel and headed straight for his common room.

He had some bastards to locate.

Three days later, five Slytherins and one Ravenclaw were found on the fourth floor corridor, all in full body binds, bruises littering their skin.

That was the end of that.

Okay, that’s a lie, that’s not the end of that story. Phil had kept many secrets from him throughout their lives, all because he feared Dan's opinion.

Dan kept this one for almost the same reason, Phil's opinion.

He didn’t tell Phil what he did for years.

He had nearly been suspended when they had given evidence that it was Dan, but upon learning about the persistent bullying McGonagall and Dumbledore gave him a week of detention instead. He took it gladly. A week of cleaning was nothing to him for what they did to Phil.

It was McGonagall who freaked him out.

It was nothing, it shouldn’t have been anything. It wasn’t- why was this affecting him this much?

She had pulled him aside after he had explained everything. The bullying. What Phil was doing to himself. Everything. She had done everything he had expected to her to do. Comfort him, explain that she would take measures against those bullies.

Then she told him. “I have to say, I’m pretty impressed. You acted like a true Gryffindor today.”

A true- blimey!

He had to sit in the courtyard for an hour to consider that. A Gryffindor, as if they were the only house that could do the right thing. As if Gryffindors were the only ones who could be brave, be strong, stand up for what they believe in.

As if a Slytherin were incapable of being anything but evil.

~~~

Looking back, maybe McGonagall didn’t know better when she sent them all to the dungeon. Maybe she couldn’t see beyond the stereotypes placed upon each house, maybe she was blind to what their true worth was.

Now, here they are, right where they belong, and it looks as if a civil war is about to break out. Wands are gripped hard in each hand, and the ones made of willow look about to snap.

Cat’s shield charm has faded and Dan is seriously contemplating firing a couple curses before he restores it. The Death Eaters are ready to tear him apart as well, a few already testing the taste of some particularly nasty spells without the wand work. It would come soon though, by the looks of it.

A small sniffle emerges from a dark corner.

It sets off a series of wails, sobs, and silent tears as a first year right by Dan breaks down entirely, falling to the floor and curling in around his fear.

Later, Dan would never admit to crying in that prison cell, but in truth, he lets a few tears escape and run their tracks down his face.

The Death Eathers huff and return to their corner, exposing their backs. Dan almost goes for it, but Cat is right. There’s a real war going on outside right now. The large scale version of the same tension in the room.


	3. Year 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which there's the Yule Ball, a scheme, a confession, and in the present: an escape attempt.

~~~

Third year snuck up on them, and so did Christmas, and then, all of a sudden, Dan was fiddling with his dress robes, trying to make them look perfect. His mother had bought him a new set of dress robes for the occasion, and when trying them on for the first time he thought he looked splendid. Now he was of the impression that he looked dumpy and ugly. God, and what was his hair even doing. He had to look perfect.

Phil had asked him to the Yule Ball.

_(Phil had a worried look on his face, and was twisting his hands nervously. “Dan… I need to ask you something? I mean, can I ask you, uh, something?”_

_Phil was stammering. Something was wrong._

_“What’s happened?” Dan concernedly asked. “Have those assholes been bothering you again?” Every word he spoke seemed to encourage his anger more. “Holy shit, they have, haven’t they? I’m going to murder them. How dare they do this to you again.” Dan started to turn around, but Phil’s arm grabbing his bicep silenced him. His heart rate sped up nevertheless._

_There was giggle, and_ Merlin help him _Phil was blushing. Shit, that was adorable. Phil self consciously tucked his fringe behind his ear, which was tipped pink. His hair had changed shades too, it was a very dark brown. Hardly noticeable, but with the amount of time that Dan spent with Phil, noticing his mannerisms was second nature._

_Dan turned around slowly, and looked at Phil with the deep most worry shining in his brown eyes. “Phil, why are you laughing? This… This is serious.”_

_Phil burst out with suppressed giggles at that point, smiling widely. “Dan, Dan. Whilst I appreciate your concern so much, and sometimes I don’t doubt the fact that you’re a Slytherin at all, but trust me. None of them have even so much as looked at me after your_ last _little talk and subtle threats, and that was two months ago. N-Not that I don’t appreciate that, m-mind. But-”_

_“I know, Phil. So, what is it that you want to talk to me about?”_

_The apprehension clouded over the Ravenclaw’s face, before he coughed. “Uhm… w-well. Okay, okay, uh… shit! Can we do this somewhere… somewhere a-a little more private?” Phil stammered out, his voice quickly approaching a whisper. Dan looked around, seeing the bustling students hurry in and out of the entrance of the Great Hall, where they stood._

_“Yeah, of course. Come with me.” Dan replied smoothly, leading Phil away. Their walk was made in a sort of comfortable silence, filled with apprehension and worry, and laced with that tension between them. Eventually they walked to the lake, and Dan sat them both down. The sun was beginning to set this early, due to the winter months. The lake was freezing over. “Okay, what was it that you needed to tell me?”_

_“Right… Well, I was in the tower-” Dan took that to mean his common room, but who knew. “-and I was reading, you know, one of those books you got me for my birthday last year. There were these two girls talking, they’re fifth years. A-and, well… they were discussing about the fact that neither of them had anyone to go with to the Yule Ball.”_

_Dan’s heart clenched painfully, and he moved one hand out of Phil’s line of sight so that he could turn it into a fist and grip tightly. Phil had… asked one of these girls out? He was going to the Yule Ball? That was obviously what he had to tell him, Dan had been disappointed he couldn’t go as he was only a third year, and he wasn’t going to ask anyone. He thought Phil had been the same, but evidently not. Dan tried his best not to show his hurt, even though he knew he had no right to, they weren’t going out. He put on his most dazzling- fake, painfully fake- smile, and hummed. “W-Wow… Phil, I’m happy for you-”_

_“Oh my_ god _Dan, for once stop interrupting me.” Phil giggled again. “Okay! I was listening to these girls, but what caught my ear was that they wanted to go with_ each other _.” Phil smiled, looking up at Dan with those eyes- eyes that Dan had never been able to avoid, from that first train journey onwards- and smiled. “They don’t know how tolerant Hogwarts is toward that sort of stuff, and they didn’t want to try their luck and get their hopes up, and potentially only get disappointment in return. So, they wanted to get dates to go with, and end up ditching them at some point so they could be together. Oh, and they obviously thought that was a little mean, so they were lamenting about this. They wanted to go together, but they needed dates that would be open to this. It was all very complicated._

_“I told them I wanted to ask my friend, but we were both too young to go.” Phil whispered that last part, but Dan heard every word. His heart stopped, his breathing stopped, his eyes went wide._

_“What?” He breathed_

_“W-Well…” Phil was gnawing on his lip, a lot paler than normal. Was that due to worry or because he had changed his skin colour somehow? “They were talking, and I just… snapped. I turned ‘round and just blurted it out. You should have seen their faces lit up, Dan… it was brilliant. Their names are Eve and Mary. They instantly agreed, and well… now all that’s left is to ask the friend that I’ve been wanting to ask._

_“Dan? Go to the Yule Ball with me?”_

_Dan paused, disbelieving. However, his face then lit up in the most spectacular smile._

_“Of course, you idiot.”)_

And here he was.

He didn’t even know if this was a _date_. Okay, he was more than at least 70% sure it was a date, but there was still the possibility that Phil only invited him as a friend, to help those girls out (like the lovely, kind-hearted Phil he knew and adored. God, this crush was suffocating, but in a good way).

If this was just a friend date, why would Phil have run away after asking him to the ball? Why was he bright red when the two girls met up with the both of them to discuss what the plan was (Phil was with Mary, Dan with Eve, and when Dan was told by the girls how excited Phil seemed to be about asking him out, both Phil’s face and hair turned pink and stayed that way for the rest of the meeting).

Why was Phil so embarrassed?

He had to like him. It wouldn’t make sense for all of that to happen if he didn’t.

So why hadn’t Dan been told straight up?

_Tonight is going to be the death of me_ , Dan thought as he ran his hand through his hair once more.

“Okay, Dan, you look fine,” piped Tom, from where he was lying sprawled out over his bed, from behind Dan. Okay, Dan may have forgotten he was there. “Oh, and trust me. Phil will take one look at you on your date and promptly die of sexual frustration.”

Had Dan been voicing his internal monologue?

Dan, turning around to stare at Tom. “Was I saying all that out loud?”

Tom rolled his eyes. “Yes, I actually found it quite endearing.”

“Well shit, okay okay. How long do I have until I have to be there?”

“10 minutes.” Tom smiled. “So calm, take a deep breath.” Tom suddenly stood up and brushed Dans fringe. “There, you look perfect. Phil will love it, trust me. Have a great time tonight, and tell me and Cat all about it.” Both Tom and Cat weren’t going, as they weren’t old enough.

Dan grinned. “Okay, okay.” He paused, before looking up at Tom with something akin to hope in his eyes. “Do you think Phil will like it?”

Tom groaned and instead of replying went to push Dan out of their room. “Just go, you absolute nitwit.”

Dan laughed and soon went to walk down to the common room. He came to face with many people in his year and below glaring at him in envy, as well as people above him in terms of years bustling around. Many of the girls looked stunning, and some of the boys were well dressed. Dan was sure none of them would even compare to Phil.

With that final glance back at Tom, who had now met up with Cat so that they could both put their thumbs up in silent encouragement, Dan left the common room. He began the walk up to the great hall, but he kept stalling to try and control his heartbeat. Okay, he could do this. Potential first date, nothing major. Oh Merlin, was he going to throw up?

Of course, he did eventually reach the entrance to the hall, and his gaze fell on Mary, who was Phil’s date. She turned to him and grinned as he walked up to her. “You look amazing.” Was the first thing he said to her, and she did; her long blonde hair had been put back in an intricate plait, and the flowing light blue dress she wore complemented her grey eyes.

“So do you!” She giggled, tucking a stray strand of hair behind her ear. “Ah, Phil’s going to love it.”

Dan suddenly became self conscious. He fiddled with his hands. “You think so?” He asked for the second time that night. “Where is Phil, anyway? You’re all in the same house, I thought you would come down together.”

“That was the original plan.” Mary spoke up. She then sighed and looked at Dan melancholily. “Look, Phil had a little bit of a freak out. Eve stayed back a little to calm him down. He’ll be here any minute now. He’s really nervous, so take it easy on him.”

Dan frowned. “What do you mean, take it easy on him?”

“He told us it was his first date, and he was so excited that it’s with you. He likes you, like, a lot. So please don’t let him down.”

Dan’s heart stopped. Then sped up. “Oh my god, it is a date.” Dan couldn’t help but grin, and soon he was bouncing. “Oh my god, I’m going on a date with Phil. This is, oh my god, when’s he going to get here?”

Mary looked at him weirdly, before her face smoothed out into a serene smile. “So you do like him back. He was worried he hadn’t made it explicitly clear and you were only going because you thought you were going as friends. Well this _is_ a relief.” She smiled.

“I didn’t know if it was a date or not, but I hoped it was.” Dan smiled. “Of course I like Phil, have you ever met him. He’s perfect, and smart, and oh god, I can’t even describe how amazing he is. I’ve liked him since second year, oh god this is great!”

“A-hem.”

Dan’s gaze snapped around and he came face to face with Eve. She also looked brilliant, Mary and Eve had obviously decided to compliment each other as her silver dress looked perfect against Mary’s blue. Her brown curls cascaded down her back, and she was smiling widely.

Wait, if Eve was now here, then where was-

Turning his head slightly to the left, he came across Phil. And, oh. He had donned dark blue robes that had been fitted to perfection, and they complimented his eyes so _well_ to make them stand out. He had lengthened his hair slightly, Dan noted, so he could style it nicely. He looked- wow.

Once again, Phil’s expression caught him off guard. He was looking at him with pure and unadulterated adoration, and disbelief, and happiness.

“Did you… hear that?” Dan breathed, his face turning more and more pink.

Phil nodded, and closed his eyes, before opening them to grin. “Yeah, I did, but I- you look great, did I tell you that? I mean, wow, but- I really like you too.”

“Yeah, I’ve heard.” He drawled out, before smiling widely.

In the background, he could hear the fanfare announcing that the doors had opened and the champions had already opened the ball. Dan wasn’t paying attention to it though, he was lost in Phil’s eyes. Phil seemed lost too, so it was all okay. It was only because of Eve’s snicker that he even snapped out of it. They smiled at each other, before taking their respective girls in their arms to they could walk through the door into the hall.

They immediately walked off to the side, and with a thank you and a goodbye, the girls walked away to enjoy the night.

Immediately afterwards, Phil turned to Dan. "You really like me?" He blurted out, without any measure of tact. "Oh my, holy _shit_."

In reply, Dan reached for Phil's hand. As soon as he made contact, they both froze. Oh god, okay. This was actually happening. This was- he was freaking out. Dan stared down at their hands, knowing that he _had to stop freaking out_. Phil slowly intertwined their fingers. Their hands fitted together comfortably, naturally. Why hadn't they held hands before, this was the best thing to ever happen to D-

"Do you want to dance with me?" Phil asked shyly, looking up at Dan through his eyelashes.

Dan nodded slowly, breathlessly. The champions were still performing the first dance, so they couldn't go on the dance floor yet.

When they could though, they stayed towards the back of the room, twirling with each other. They moved slowly, simply; Phil's head resting on Dan's shoulder, hands around Dan's neck. Dan's hands lay on Phil's waist, holding him close

(They tried to actually dance, especially to the faster songs, but Phil had next to no coordination. He had so talented in many areas, but dancing? Not a chance.

And besides, they were completely comfortable with just this. It wasn't perfect, but neither felt they'd settle for anything else. They relished in the closeness of each other, hardly even listening to the music anymore when they could opt to listen to the other's breathing. They had fallen so, so hard.)

Halfway through the night the feast was served. They ate slowly, sipping on their stew. Dan was on the left and Phil on the right so they could hold hands underneath the table. Eve and Mary sat on the same table, and they kept giving them serene smiles.

They went back to dancing, however it was less dancing now that the Weird Sisters were playing. It was more just laughing for them; they both giggled their way through. Dan twirled Phil under his arm, and Phil gave the sort of breathless laugh that made Dan’s breath stop completely. They bumped into people, without a care in the world. Everyone dancing was out of breath but the euphoria over the crowd was like a spell. It was infectious.

They crashed straight into a 4th year girl wearing periwinkle blue robes, even slightly messing up her elegant bun, but she merely smiled and resumed dancing with the Durmstrang student -that Dan vaguely recognised- without another word.

Midnight was fast approaching however, but neither one of them wanted the night to end. At quarter to, Dan looked at Phil and hummed noncommittally. “Hey,” He whispered into the ear of the man whose head lay on his shoulder once more. Phil looked up, still moving his feet so they span slowly. “Come on, let’s sneak out to the lake.”

Phil raised an eyebrow, shooting up to hide beneath his fringe. Dan gave him an odd look, but it seemed to work. Phil started to slowly grin, and gave a sharp, enthusiastic nod of the head.

They were giggling as they ran out to the lake, Dan leading Phil by their hands. The ground outside was covered in frost, and the lake was icy and frozen over. Their breath turned into water vapour in front of their eyes, but neither seemed to mind the cold. It was just another excuse to hold each other tighter in their arms.

So they did.

Enveloped in Dan’s arms, Phil couldn’t help but grin. “Wow, I… tonight has just been-”

“Perfect?” Dan finished his sentence for him. “Amazing? Wonderful? Are those adjectives right?”

Phil snorted, flushing as he looked down upon their feet. “All of those and any positive adjective in the world.”

Dan smiled, and held Phil a little closer. That little squeeze had Phil looking upwards again. They were so close he could see the details in Phil’s irises, and as Phil’s eyes darted up to make eye contact from where he had been looking at Dan’s lips, Dan could see them darken ever so slightly, cerulean becoming azure. Dan’s mouth dried up, and he too allowed his eyes to flicker from Phil’s eyes, to his lips, and back again.

Dan couldn’t even remember who leaned in first. He’d probably say himself, he was always sort of reckless like that, but Phil would say he did. In reality they met in the middle, their lips connecting like two puzzle pieces to fit together.

Oh god, it was everything he had ever dreamed of.

It was tentative at first. It was dipping a toe into a pool, or a finger into a bath. A testing-the-waters sort of experience. Then they moved, Phil leaning up on his toes ever so slightly to give him the leverage to press his lips more firmly. Dan accompanied that by holding his waist tighter, so he wouldn’t topple. It was a sort of a give and take scenario, sweet and loving.

They pulled away ever so slightly, Phil putting his weight back on his heels as Dan leaned down to rest their heads together. Appreciative noises emanated out of the pair, and they both closed their eyes in tranquility.

“Go out with me?”

“Mhm… okay. If I have to.”

~~~

God, there must be a spell he’s forgetting, something, _something_ that he’s missing. There’s got to be a way out of this dungeon.

For the past who knows how long he’s traced every millimeter of their side of the room -there’s no way he going near those Death Eaters but he’s starting to seriously consider it now, if it means he’ll have a chance at getting to Phil faster.

He’s pressed his fingers into every brick, hoping it’ll open a secret passageway like in that Muggle movie he saw with Phil, whispered and yelled every charm he knows (even the bread making one he taught Phil on their first train ride to Hogwarts) and resorted to jabbing the back of his wand into the mortar until dust flew. Maybe he could break the window to the lake?

Cat’s tired voice says ‘Dan. Dan, stop it. Dan,’ every so often but it does nothing to calm him down until he finally slumps down beside her, defeated.

“Cat. What are we doing?”

“I don’t know. Just waiting, I guess.”

“Waiting?!” Despite his exhaustion, a new burst of adrenaline shoots him up to his feet. “Until what? Until everybody’s dead and Bellatrix Lestrange shows up right there to kill us next?” He points to the door that’s vanished, leaving behind only a smooth wall.

He stumbles his way over to the small, blank painting on same the wall the door used to be in. It’s charmed to let the viewer see through to the hall, and Dan prays that he’ll see somebody there.

Preferably not Bellatrix, but if she’s willing to let him out if only for a second to see Phil before she kills him, well that would be okay too.

It’s hopeless, obviously. Everybody’s got to be fighting for their lives right now and even Filch is long gone, having taken what seems to be the only key with him.

Dan’s face is pressed impossibly into the frame and he _swears_ he can hear Mrs. Norris meowing but maybe he’s just been in here too long.

After all, who knows what Snape brews in his spare time.


	4. Year 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which one member of our duo is hiding something, there is an argument, you'll hate Umbridge even more, and the battle has finally began.

~~~

“What do you think Snape does in his spare time?”

“Probably turns into a bat and terrorizes Muggle children.”

Phil swats Dan’s arm. “Seriously.” They’re lying in the grass on the banks of the lake. Fourth year them is calm, peaceful, and in blissful infatuation.

“Or he comes up with dastardly plans to otherthrow the Defence against the Dark Arts teacher for the year.”

Phil snorts, and looks up to the sky. It’s a warm September this year, and whilst the sky is not quite clear, it’s clear enough for the sun to hit them properly. October was just about to come, and Dan was excited for days where he would have an excuse to bundle up with scarves and cuddle into his boyfriend. “I would tell you off for being sarcastic, but that very well could be a serious answer.”

Phil turns his head to look at Dan. “Dan, I- you know, there’s talk around. About Umbridge, and you know her views on blood status. I just, I don’t know, I feel like I should-”

“I don’t really want to think about that right now. For now, it’s just you and me and this lake and that bird over there and the millions of ants that are probably contemplating how delicious our flesh is.”

“Alright.” Phil lays his head back down into the grass, grabbing Dan’s hand. “What do you reckon the clouds are thinking?”

“That one?” Dan tilts his chin to a lone cloud floating just to their right. “Probably ‘I have no friends’.”

Phil smiled. “Probably.”

Dan looked up to the clouds, pointing out one that looked like a Puffskein as he spotted it. That turned into a game of Cloud Spotting, and throughout it all Dan stayed pressed against Phil.  
“Hey,” Dan piped up. “Ready for Hogsmeade this weekend?”

Phil stopped in his tracks, and the hand raised towards the sky fell to his side. “Uh, actually, about that. I can’t go with you this weekend.”

Dan frowned, and sat up to fully look at Phil. “Why not? We’ve gone on every Hogsmeade trip together since they’ve began.”

“I- I’ve been asked to go with Colin and some of his friends, s’all, he says it’s important.”

“Well, why can’t I go with?” He asked incredulously.

“Well, it’s just… they don’t tru-, no… well, they kinda just want it to be a- a, just our Care of Magical Creatures group, you know? I’m really sorry, Dan. I’ll buy you a meal in Madame Puddifoot’s next time we go, okay?”

Dan really wished that Phil would have finished his original sentence, but he wouldn’t push. Besides, he didn’t want to seem clingy. “Okay, I’ll just go with Tom and Cat, no problem. I’ll finally get Tom to try a Butterbeer.”

Phil smiled, and sat up so he could kiss Dan’s cheek. “Thank you.” Phil whispered. “Now, come lie back down, and explain to me how that cloud is a Hippogriff and not a pig on an eagle.”

~~~

The small torch in the hallway has gone out, and Dan isn’t even sure how that is possible. The magic was cast to last, but somebody must be messing with Hogwarts’ internal web of magic. It’s completely dark outside, but in their cell, a sixth year half-blood has relit the fireplace, a mock-campfire in the darkness of the room.

Cat has gathered with some of the smaller students around it and begun to tell stories to calm them and Dan thinks he even hears a giggle or two here and there. Tom is curled up right into the wall, feigning sleep.

A fifth year girl comes round and seats herself right next to Dan. Dan recognizes her from the Ravenclaw table, always sitting next to Luna Lovegood. Their Slytherin ties were the only green among the blue, but Dan never caught her name.

For a few heartbeats they are completely silent, listening to the crackle of the fire. That must be a separate charm, Dan thinks, wand fires are silent-

“You don’t have anything to be worried about.”

Dan almost laughs at the preposterousness of the girl’s statement, but he just lowers his head to his knees as he contemplates just how many things he really does have to worry about. His parents, probably dueling dark wizards in the ministry, if Voldemort does manage to take Hogwarts, and _of course_ -

“Phil Lester. He’s your boyfriend, yeah?”

Dan nods. Oh, Phil.

“You know, it’s the ones we love that usually don’t need our worrying. Worrying is only going to open your mind to Nargle attacks.”

Dan doesn’t ask what a Nargle is, but the girl’s got some points. Worrying is going to do nothing. He needs to get out of here.

~~~

He thought everything was okay. He didn’t think Phil would ever do anything so _stupid_.

He never thought that Phil would lie to him again. But here they were.

A rainy Monday in April brought on the epiphany. There had been whispers, mumbling throughout the halls of Hogwarts of a secret organisation. Potter’s secret organisation, more like. On the other hand, Dan had been approached by Umbridge, as a Slytherin, to join her Inquisitorial Squad. He considered it for all of five seconds before politely turning her down. He just, wasn’t interested. Also, he really didn’t like her for so many, many reasons.

_(Phil lazily pressed his lips against Dan’s neck, smiling gently. “You know, I wish we could stay up here all night.” He whispered, gesticulating around the Astronomy tower. They had both taken it since their third year, a class they shared together._

_Dan couldn’t help but beam. “Mhm, I don’t know. Should I?”_

_“Oh, I think you should.” Phil smiled, leaning up to connect their lips. Phil tasted delectable, like the pumpkin pie they had earlier that evening. Dan relished in it, kissing Phil with everything he had. Soon, they were panting but unable-unwilling-to stop._

_Dan moved back, only so he could comfortably take Phil’s robes in his hands to pull him closer and keep him there. The little moan that escaped Phil’s mouth was all the encouragement that Dan needed, and he kissed him again and again and ag-_

_“Oh my!” There was a cry, and they separated as quickly as they could. There stood Umbridge, in all her pink, toady glory. “Back to your dormitories, at once! I should expect better. 10 points off from Ravenclaw. Spit spock, off you go!”_

_Phil stood up, floundering around confusedly. “What, why? 10 points, that’s ridiculous!”_

_“Detention, Mr. Lester. Tomorrow, 5 o’clock, for sheer cheek.”_

_“What the- How does Slytherin not get any points knocked off?”_

_“Another detention.” Umbridge piped up, and Phil gasped. “The insolence I’m receiving. I’m giving Mr. Howell the benefit of the doubt. I expect,” She gave a gloriously fake, high pitched cough, “all of the Slytherins to be well behaved. A true calibre of Wizard. I certainly do not expect them to be fooling around with, well,” her smile turned sickly sweet. “someone less pure.”_

_Dan should have said something. He knows he should have, and by keeping quiet, he was conforming to the exact view of Slytherins he was so against._

_He watched Phil’s expectant face slowly fall into disappointment and then horror at Umbridge’s giddy smile._

_“Of course, all wizards are equal, you know. Some are just more equal than others.”_

_Dan licked his lips as his mouth had been hanging open the entire time and was just engaging his vocal chords when-_

_Phil shook his head and hurried away._

_“Phil-”_

_“Don’t worry, dear, there are much better that you could associate yourself with.”)_

Then, it happened.

It wasn’t anything big at first, Dan hadn’t expected anything big from it. He was only preambling along the fifth floor corridor because he was bored and _Phil was nowhere to be seen again._

Then there was a crash, and suddenly students were running out of- okay, a door had just appeared out of nowhere, that was weird- a large oak door. Gryffindors, Ravenclaws, Hufflepuffs, no Slytherins. Why were they all in there?

He watched them run past him, a fifth year Gryffindor with bushy hair, a fourth year ravenclaw practically skipping past, a pair of ginger twins laughing as they ran away, another fourth year ravenclaw with black hair and- Phil?

It was Phil. Why was Phil in that room with that random amalgamation of three of the houses? He stood there frozen, as he watched Phil run up towards the library, tucking his wand back into his robes. He could see their pursuiters now, the goddamn Inquisitorial Squad, Filch and the Toad herself, Professor Umbridge. He prayed Phil would get away, but that answered none of his questions. What was he doing in that room?

People were still running out of the room, and lo and behold, Dan caught a glimpse of a lightning scar hid under black hair. Potter. Oh-oh god. Phil was in the organisation that Umbridge said was conspiring against the ministry?

Why the fuck would he help Potter? He was a lunatic, he must have thought that You Know Who was back!

Dan turned slowly, not bothering to watch the chase between Potter and that blonde fifth year from his own house. He slowly walked towards the library, not paying attention to anyone. He couldn’t even concentrate, his mind whirring and filling with increasingly impossible ideas. Why hadn’t Phil told him anything? Was this where he was disappearing to all the time? Could he even trust Phil anymore? What else was he keeping from him?

The library wasn’t far away, and Dan walked towards the entrance to wait. If he knew Phil at all, he would take the long way around to get here, one of their usual meeting places. Where they would sit together, hold hands as they read together. Either that, or he would end up at the lake, where they would cuddle together and bask in the weather. (They had so many amazing memories together, so many, more he could even call to mind, they were _happy_. He thought they were happy! Why did Phil consistently do this?)

Sure enough, Phil came along. He was red faced, and panting for breath. He doubled over, hands on his knees, before trying to slump into the library. Dan blocked his path. Phil crashed into him, and as he stumbled backwards to apologise, Phil froze. Dan could feel the fear radiating off of Phil, but he didn’t let that affect him.

Dan shook his head, and frowned. “You want to explain some things to me, Phil?”

Phil was shellshocked, not able to even blink. Dan was about to speak again and ask him once more when he was beaten to it.

“Howell!”

Dan turned around, seeing a burly Slytherin in the year above him stomp over. He could see the glinting shield on his chest with the curvy I. An Inquisitorial squad member. Phil gulped, obviously trying to control his breathing so that it didn’t look like he had just been running for his life. “Oh… uh. Crabbe, right?”

“Where’s your friend been?” Slytherin-boy-who-could-possibly-be-Crabbe barked. “Why’s he like that?”

Dan tried to not roll his eyes, or groan, at how dimwitted this kid seemed to be. “What? Bright red? Well.” He put on a big smirk. “We just had a, well, you don’t want to know the details.”

The boy furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, and an eternity later something seemed to click in the space between his ears and he frowned. “Whatever.” He snapped. “That’s disgusting.” He soon prowled away, seeing something else that had caught his interest.

Dan turned to Phil and silently demanded information. Phil took a step back, before looking around. “Not here.” He whispered. “Seriously. God, not the lake either, or the library. Quick, go towards the Forbidden Forest.”

Phil scarpered off, and Dan followed. Dan had an eerie suspicion that Phil somehow seemed to have experience sneaking around, staying in the shadows, and soon they were hiding in the fringes of the forest. Phil looked around nervously before casting the Silencing Charm around them so that they could talk freely.

“You- You have some serious explaining to do.”

Phil groaned, and leaned against a tree. “I know, I know!”

“Then tell me!” Dan bit, seething. “What is with you and keeping secrets from me? We’re together, Phil, you can’t keep doing this.”

“I wouldn’t if I didn’t have to!” Phil’s voice is loud and broken, then it shrinks down to a whisper. “I wouldn’t if I didn’t need to.”

Dan sighed, exasperated, “Why do you need to? What were you doing with Potter and his gang?”

Phil let out a deep breath. “You don’t need to know, Dan. It’s none of your business.”

“It’s all of my business, Phil! Educational decree number twenty four, _all student organisations are to be disbanded unless approved by the High Inquisitor, or face expulsion_. You could get expelled, Phil,” Dan didn’t mean for the malice in his voice, but it crept in anyway, replacing the worry and hurt.

“Oh god, don’t you think I know that?” Phil retaliated. He really was getting worked up now. His ears had started flushing bright red and he was swinging his arms back and forth, as if he couldn’t decide whether to cross his arms or clench his fists for fear of actually punching Dan in the face.“You sound like a fucking member of the Inquisitorial Squad.”

Dan was taken aback, frightened to think that he could be compared to them. “I’m not. You- god -You know I’m not.”

“I- Of course I do.” Phil whispered. His arms were still, but it didn’t sound particularly convincing.

“Good, because- wait, no. We’re not getting off topic here. Why the hell were you going to Potter’s little meet and greet?”

“I- I’m not saying, you wouldn’t-”

“No, you’re telling me. You are fucking telling me, Phil. Why the fuck would you throw everything away like this?! Why the hell would y-”

“‘Cause no one else was going to teach me, and I need to learn, Dan. I needed to know!”

“Teach you what, Phil?” Dan breathed, imploring Phil on.

The pause seemed to last forever. Dan thought he could hear shouts coming from the castle, even with the Silencing Charm in place. “Defence Against the Dark Arts,” Phil admitted finally.

Dan frowned, his face scrunching up. “Why?” -He asked in a long exhale.- “Why would you need to know?” The words came rushing out in a long breath.

“You know, this is exactly why I didn’t tell you. You don’t understand!” Phil exclaimed.

“That’s because you don’t tell me anything, Phil!” Dan retorted, exasperated. “Wait… no. Are you actually believing the bullshit Potter’s sprouting about You Know Who bein-”

“It’s not bullshit. It’s real.” Phil turned away.

“Oh. My. God.” Dan seethed, catching Phil’s shoulder and wrenching it back. “It’s not real, Phil. He’s not back. He was destroyed years ago!” No, he refused to believe this. He couldn’t even consider this. If there was a possibility that You Know Who was back… Phil was in danger. Phil would be in so much danger.

“No! He’s back. Dumbledore says so.”

“Dumbledore says so, hm? That makes it right?”

“He wouldn’t… he wouldn’t lie about this. He’s back, Dan!”

“I don’t believe you!” Dan shouted. “There’s no way he’s-”

“God,” Phil groaned, interrupting him once more. “Why are you being so fucking stubborn!” he screeched. Dan was never happier for the Silencing Charm. “For once, for the first time since we’ve met, just this once, would you listen to me-”

“Why should I? You never told me any of this! How can I just listen to you now?”

“God, I don’t fucking know! You just have to believe me!” Phil glared at Dan, and in those hard blue eyes Dan saw that Phil had reached his limit. He had never seen Phil so angry, or act so irrationally. “Maybe because I'm your boyfriend? Maybe because of what I've had to do for the past few months? Maybe so you and the rest of your Slytherin buddies can rejoice at the news that You Know Who is back.”

Dan recoiled backwards as if struck by a stunning spell. His eyes widened, and he stared at Phil in shock. Phil… honestly thought that of him?

Phil had the ever so slightest hint of remorse in his eyes, at least, if that was any consolation.

Dan had to steady himself against a tree, and his chin dropped down to his chest. When he spoke up next, his voice betrayed nothing of the shouting match they just had. Instead, his voice was timid and meek. “Where does this leave us now, then?”

Phil’s reply was just as small. “It doesn’t change anything. Nothing _has_ changed. We’ll just, forget about this. There are more important things we need to deal with.”

Dan gave a dumb nod, looking at Phil with tearful eyes. “Y-Yeah… okay. This never happened.”

~~~

Midnight passes.

A loud crash comes from upstairs, through the ceiling, and if that isn’t a signal that the battle has begun, what else could be? The sound reverberates through Dan, and causes him to shake in tremors. Even the Death Eaters look around in fear.

It was then the screams start.

It was if it had only just sunk in for some people that they are trapped here while a battle is going on. People start to scream, hit on walls, calling out for anyone to hear them and get them out. Chaos.

The cacophony rouses Tom, and he looks around before pulling himself up to his feet, casting sparks up in the air to garner the whole room’s attention. They all turn to him, many with tears racing down their cheeks, many shaking.

“This isn’t going to help anyone.” Tom sighs, “We need to think our way out of this. So calm down, we’re safe for now. Get your heads together and come up with a plan.” He turns away and walks over to the emergency cupboard, grabbing two bottles. “We have calming draught here, if anyone needs any come to me.”

Soon there is a queue of people in front of Tom, all wrapping their arms around each other. The Death Eaters never move from their corner, deciding on a plan of action. Those on Dan’s side that didn’t go to Tom group together. The girl who had sat next to Dan is one of them. They start discussing plans, anything that could help. Spells, defences, how to get out of the castle once they were out.

The Slytherins’ self preservation instincts kick in.

Dan, however, sits far away from the rest. He’s shaking almost uncontrollably, but has absolutely no wish for the potion. He needs to think clearly, come up with a plan.

Eventually, Cat takes over for Tom, and he comes to sit by Dan. “Dan, go take some of the potion. You’re on the brink of a panic attack.”

Dan shakes his head wildly, bringing his knees up to his chest. “No. I can’t. I need a clear head. I need to think of a plan. Help me think.”

Tom hesitates, before nodding, and quickly begins to brainstorm with him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter was also where i fell in love with my beta, who put in the George Orwell quote. props to you if you know which one it is


	5. Year 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which there is more prejudice placed against our Ravenclaw, an admittal, and a toast.

~~~

_(They lay side by side, Phil’s head on Dan’s chest as he curled up closer. It was the summer holiday between their fourth and fifth year, and Phil was over for a week._

_They didn’t speak about the events that happened at the end of last year._

_Phil’s left hand moved over Dan’s chest, smiling to himself. “Did you know that the only way to chase away a Nogtail is with a pure white dog?”_

_Dan laughed, his fingers raking through Phil’s hair. “Is this an actual fact or a Phil fact, now?”_

_Phil pouted. “It’s an actual fact, asshole. It’s in Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them.”_

_“Haven’t read it in years.” Dan laughed, and at Phil’s horrified look he moved his hands up in surrender. “I don’t take Care of Magical Creatures, never needed to read it again after the first year.”_

_“That needs to change.” Phil rolled his eyes. “Newt Scamander is a genius for finding out all tho-”_

_There was a sudden erratic knock, before Dan’s mother scurried in. “Ah, boys. Dan, well, your grandfather is here. Just apparated in now. And, well, he wants to meet your ‘friend.’”_

_Dan froze, staring at his mother. “Serious?”_

_She nodded. "Very. Get dressed." She replied, but not without sending Phil a sympathetic look before leaving._

_Phil got up. "I... What?" He watched Dan scurry around the room, putting on the shirt Dan chucked him without a word._

_"Come on." Dan hummed, putting on his shirt and doing his hair._

_"Dan. What's happen-" Phil didn't get to finish that sentence, instead being led downstairs by Dan. “Dan, tell me.”_

_“It’s nothing, Phil. Don’t worry.” Dan smiled as reassuringly as he could. It would be fine. Nothing to worry about. His grandfather would love Phil, who wouldn’t? No one could ever hate Phil, he was perfect. He just really wanted his grandfather’s approval. He really wanted Phil to be accepted._

_What he did though just made Phil frown harder. “Your grandfather is here?” He asked._

_Dan paused. He stopped and turned to Phil. “Yeah. Really, it’s nothing. I just want him to like you as much as I do.”_

_Phil raised an eyebrow, before grinning. He reached forward and hugged Dan tightly, relaxing into his arms. “I like you so much, you know?” He giggled, turning his head to kiss Dan’s jaw. “It’s so cute that you care about his opinion so much like that.”_

_Dan rolled his eyes. “Yeah, yeah, you tosspot. Come on, he wants to meet you!”_

_Phil smiled, but stayed in Dan’s arms. He leaned up to kiss Dan, lips lingering for a moment as he closed his eyes. He moved back slowly, smiling._

_Dan was blushing, but he laughed giddily. “Come on.” He replied, still giggling. He smiled, walking into the room with his boyfriend._

_Dan’s grandfather was an imposing man, someone your attention immediately went to in the room. He stood with an air of superiority, you could feel it as soon as you looked at him. He was almost stereotypical, his nose upturned and wearing the finest wizarding robes. The warm smile he gave Dan ruined it all, though, and when Dan grinned back, Phil tried to relax accordingly._

_The man walked up to Dan -he walked just as he stood, the authority spoke volumes- and placed a gentle hand on his shoulder. “Dan, my boy, how are you? Who’s your friend here?”_

_“I’m good.” He hummed. “And this is Phil, Phil Lester. He’s my bo-”_

_“Lester, hm? I don’t believe I know the name.”_

_Phil fumbled. “Y-Yeah, it’s a weird one, right? It means ‘People from Leicester’, even though I’m not even from there.”_

_Dan’s grandfather gave a chuckle. “Oh really? Interesting.”_

_He looked like he was about to speak again, when Dan saw his mother beckoning Dan silently from the kitchen. “Ah. Well, I’ll leave you two to get to know each other, Mum wants me.” Dan smiled at Phil as he slowly made the walk to the kitchen._

_Before he reached the kitchen, he could hear his grandfather saying, “So, what do your parents do? Good jobs in the Ministry?”_

_And as he closed the kitchen door behind him, he heard Phil’s reply. “O-Oh no. My dad’s a lawyer, and my mum’s a secondary school teacher.”_

_Then the kitchen door closed and Dan could hear no more of their conversation. “Yeah, mum, what’ya want?”_

_Dan’s mother sighed. “Honey, I know you want to, I can tell, but I don’t think letting your grandfather know about you and Phil is a good idea.”_

_Dan scowled. “Why not?” he questioned, looking at his mother. “He deserves to know, he’ll love Phil! He’ll be happy for me.”_

_He watched as his mother gave an audible gulp. “Look, Dan, I don’t know how to say this.” She leaned against the counter, half heartedly waving her wand so that the soup ladle kept stirring in the cauldron. “Your grandfather is… traditional.”_

_“Oh._ Oh _.” Dan bit his lip. Oh, Merlin, it never occurred to him that his grandfather could be homophobic. Not many Wizards were these days. God, he wasn’t even_ out _to his grandfather. What was he doing? “Oh, right. Okay. I-I… I understand.”_

_Dan’s mother smiled. “Thank you, Dan. Now, before you go back in and save Phil from your grandfather-” She sounded serious, but she had to be joking “-can you go down to the basement and get the wine?”_

_Dan nodded, and did just that._

_When he returned to Phil, he didn’t notice how Phil’s head was slightly hung, or how his eyes were full of tears. He didn’t notice how his grandfather’s expression was cold, nor did he listen to the whispers he was telling Phil._

_No, Dan sat down and smiled. “So, Grandfather, did you like the book I sent you for your birthday?”_

_Phil didn't say a word until his Grandfather left an hour later.)_

 *

It was fifth year when everything came to a head.

You Know W- no... Voldemort was back, there was no denying it now. There was too much proof. Dan even felt stupid for trying to fool himself for so long, for not believing Phil. For not believing Potter even.

Voldemort was back and now Muggle-borns were in even greater danger than before.

They tried to forget about the secrets, tried to move on. Sometimes, it worked. Sometimes, they could be together without any doubts or fears and just that feeling that what they had was all they needed.

Then they remembered what both lay in front of them, and what they had already faced.

The tension both of them felt ran clear. Ever since that April morning they had constructed a window between them. Transparent enough that they could see one another and smile. Have a good time. Thick enough that they kept to themselves. No secrets were shared anymore.

_(“Have you done the Defense Against the Dark Arts homework yet?”_

_“Of course not. It’s all just a load of crap.” Phil was leaning casually against the library shelf as Dan’s eyes scrounged the titles, wandering up and down the rows and columns of spines. “What’s the point of reading about something? You need to do it practically to actually be able to use it in the real world!”_

_Dan rolled his eyes. “Whatever.” Dan turned to Phil, who looked slightly frustrated, but Dan really didn’t need to hear about how DADA was taught wrong right now. “Now…” He took a couple steps down the aisle. Curse whoever sorted these books last, “I’m looking for…” A few more shuffles._

_“I can’t believe this is the day when Daniel Howell is spending his free time in the library, actually working.”_

_“Shut up! This is for Herbology…” His fingers traced the books, “That one!” His eyes landed on_ An Extensive Study of Fanged Geraniums in Tropical Climates _on the highest shelf but his fingers didn’t even graze the bottom of the spine. “I swear they always put the books I’m looking for on the top shelf,” Dan huffed as he jumped, trying to grab the thick text book to no avail, only managing to push it farther back._

_Phil snorted. “That’s because nobody likes the books you look for.” His arms extended over Dan’s shoulder and easily retrieved the dusty title._

_“Okay, what charm did you use-” Dan whirled around to see Phil’s feet planted on the ground, barely having raised his heels to grab the book for Dan._

_“No. Way.” It was simultaneous, but the emotions expressed were completely different._

_“I’m taller than you,” Phil’s wide eyes lit up with glee._

_“Shut up. No, you’re not.” Dan yanked the book unceremoniously out of Phil’s hand and stomped away. He could hear Phil crashing into a shelf on his way after him, and he turned around to see Phil snickering._

_“I’m taller, Oh god, this is so great!” Phil laughed, walking up to Dan. He stood close, and Dan exhaled a sigh of frustration when he had to look up to meet Phil’s eyes._

_“Shut up!” Dan groaned, turning around. “Sit down with me and do your goddamn Defence Against the Dark Arts homework, you tosser.”_

_Phil’s frustrated look returned. “Still don’t see the point in it, I mean, as a Mug-”_

_“Phil, Phil, I get it.” Dan waved him off, opening his Herbology book and turning to the first chapter. “Just do your homework, and avoid the wrath of Snape,okay? Do you really want to be cleaning cauldrons all night? No, you don’t.”_

_Phil started to avoid Dan’s gaze, and he nodded to himself. He took out his bag and put down a roll of parchment. “Fine.” He stated plainly, no sugar coating on his emotions._

_Dan ignored it, though. Phil could be annoyed all he wanted about having to do his homework but Dan would rather Phil be with him than in detention._

_He wanted to spend every moment he had with Phil, more than ever now that the danger they were in increased every day._

_Dan reached for Phil’s hand so that he could take it in his under the table, but as it was more often than not these days, Phil’s hand wasn’t there.)_

A misty November afternoon came upon them, rain falling in scattered spells. They stood on the bridge, watching the rain fall into the lake, stop, and then start again.

There was a space between them, as if they were oppositely-charged magnets repelling each other. Dan’s hands were taunt against the wooden cloister, Phil's tucked away in his pocket.

Neither had discussed any of their secrets since April. Neither had tried.

_Well_ , Dan thought, _enough is enough._

There was a silence before the sound as even the rain paused, the quiet before the storm.

"This can't go on."

~~~

“I can’t help but think how different life would be right now if I was, like, a Hufflepuff,” Tom says after 10 minutes, the roar of the battle only having slightly subsided.

Dan scoffs. “Yeah. How different. I can’t imagine. My whole family’s Slytherin.”

Tom looks sideways up to the ceiling. “My uncle’s the only wizard in my immediate family, a Gryffindor. Hogwarts always seemed like a story, and the Slytherins were the bad guys. Even from the beginning, before I knew anything about this world…” he trails off.

Dan nods. “Before Hogwarts, my grandfather told me how we were supposed to be on a higher level than the rest, but now I realize... We’ve always been ostracized, set apart. Maybe in beginning, Slytherins didn’t even think they were superior, but eventually it becomes a ‘It’s not that you don’t want us, it’s that we look down on you’ thing. Do you get what I mean?”

Tom shakes his head until he resembles a rattle drum. “Maybe. Are you suggesting that maybe Slytherins are the victims? I mean, it seems so absurd to wrap my head around.”

“I don’t even know what I’m trying to say. So many people think me better for being a Slytherin, but even more people shun me for it.”

“Life would be easier if there were no houses.”

A muffled cry from outside.

“You think so? I know some Gryffindors whose lives are their house. And Phil, even, he’s such a Ravenclaw. He kept things from even me for the ‘greater good’, at his own expense.”

~~~

Phil blanched and quivered. “I know,” he whispered, turning to Dan. “I have no idea where to start.” His right hand emerged out of his pocket and ran through his fringe. It was shorter now, unable to be tucked behind his ear. His skin was darker too, slightly less translucent, as if he had been on holiday recently. He looked, well, older.

For some reason, it caught Dan’s eye. They haven’t held hands, properly held hands, since… Merlin, he doesn’t even know how long. He reached forward. “Phil… Wait. What’s that on your hand?” He pressed Phil’s hand between his palms. “Wow, you’ve never told me this story. You never told me you had a- a… _a scar_.” Dan fumbled, the angry, raised edges coming fully into view now.

The words _‘Mudbloods aren't real wizards’_ were a startling white even against Phil’s less translucent skin.

Dan couldn’t even comprehend it, all he did was look at Phil with horror spelled out in his features. “When? W-Why?” Then the dam broke. “Oh my god, who did this to you?” He cried, the sound echoing through the valley.

Phil gave a watery, sad, smile. “It doesn’t matter.” He murmured, looking down at Dan. Curse that bloody growth spurt. Despite that, Dan shook his head. If it was those Slytherins again- god!

“It very well does matter!” Dan declared, groaning. “Who the fuck did this to you?”

Phil rolled his eyes. “Like you care.” He spat.

“Like I… Phil-” Dan gasped, before going on the defensive. “Like I care? Do you really think so lowly of me? Holy fuck, Phil! You’re my boyfriend, of course I care.”

“No you don’t!” Phil yelled. “I’ve had this scar since _last year_ , Dan, you ass. You haven’t noticed at all.”

The Slytherin blanched, shaking his head. “No, I would’ve noticed it if it suddenly happened. I would’ve! Stop trying to trick me!”

“Oh. My. God. You always think I’m tricking you, lying to you. You don’t care at all, Dan, so don’t you dare try and tell me you-”

“I do. I do, Phil, of course I do.”

“Then act like it!” Phil shouted, interrupting Dan. “You do this all the time, Dan. You don’t understand. You don’t know what it’s like to constantly, _constantly_ , be reminded of what I am.” Dan was stunned into silence, as Phil thrust his hand into Dan’s face. “Having to look at myself and see what everyone knows I am, a- _a mudblood_.”

“Phil-”

“No, no. Please, just listen.” Phil took a deep breath. “I tried to tell you, all the time. When I asked you, second year, whether or not you thought any less of me because of who I am, I can still remember that you asked, ‘Why are you asking that?’ instead of answering, like you didn’t understand why I ever doubted you. Well, Dan, because of every single possible reason on the entire earth. For fuck’s sake, you’re a Slytherin!”

Dan swallowed. He couldn’t speak, couldn’t even fathom... words. This was- “Yeah,” he whispered. “I am.”

Phil looked taken aback by Dan’s tone, but it only served to spur him on. “Yeah. Everything you are, everything I am, those are our houses, Dan. Your house _hates_ people like me. Hates Muggle-borns. It was the Heir of Slytherin who attacked Muggle-borns in our first year! It was that group of Slytherins who tormented me! It was Umbridge who gave me this scar! And now, Voldemort, going around killing Muggles and Muggle-borns, god, can’t you see that people like you despise us?”

One word caught Dan’s ear, and his eyes remaining locked on Phil’s as he whispered, “Umbridge?”

Phil let Dan take his hand once more between his own, once again looking shocked at Dan’s soft tone. Dan ran his thumb over the words, gentle, as if they could be erased if he did so. “Yeah.”

Dan gnawed on the inside of his lip, willing himself to remain calm. “How?”

Phil seemed to deflate. “The… the b-black quill,” he stammered. “Every detention I had with her-” Thinking back, Phil did have a lot of detentions because of her, always getting them for standing up to her in class or being caught with Dan in random places. Actually, a few times she just gave him detention for the sake of it. “-she would give me this quill, r-right. No ink. Told me to write lines. She told me to write until the message soaked in.” Phil had to look up, tears forming at the corners of his eyes. “It wrote in blood. My blood.”

Dan gaped. “That’s barbaric!” He gasped, looking up at Phil. “How- How dare she?! Wait. Merlin, did she cut you to use your blood as ink? How did she get you to write in blood?”

“The quill, it was enchanted. I would write, and the words would appear on my skin as the blood was siphoned to the parchment. Every word I wrote cut into me. I had to write it over, and over again. Until the message sunk in. Until I believed it.” Phil gulped. “Now it’s a scar. I use my Metamorphmagus powers to keep myself looking at it, if I use them I can will it away, but it’s forever there under the surface. It’s a scar I’ll never be able to get rid of.”

Dan was silent.

Phil furrowed his eyebrows. “Well, aren’t you going to say something?”

Dan shook his head. “No, I’m not.” He said slowly. “I never noticed how much you kept things inside, to yourself. I’ve been, the _worst_ boyfriend, the worst _friend_. I let this happen to you, and I’m so,  _so_ , sorry.” Dan gulped, raising his chin off his chest to meet Phil’s wavering eyes. “I’ve always vented to you about, Merlin, about the most trivial things and you were always there to listen. I think… It’s about time you got to open up to me.”

Phil sighed deeply. “Dan, there’s just a lot-”

“One thing at a time,” Dan says, pulling on Phil’s hand, “And somewhere a bit more private.”

Another deep sigh.

Somewhere a bit more private turned out to be the Boathouse, and Phil sat down on the docks, swinging his legs above the water. Dan did the same. He watched as Phil took his wand out and cast the Silencing Charm.

Phil looked up to the sky, and gave a long enduring sigh. Dan had missed those blue eyes. “I… I have no idea where to start. This is not a conversation I thought I’d have.”

Dan stifled a cough, looking out towards the lake. “Mind if I ask, then?”

Phil turned to Dan slowly, as if disbelieving he had even uttered those words. “Y-Yeah. Go on then.”

“Tell me about last year. About what Umbridge did to you, and about that group you were in. Potter’s little syndicate.”

“I… right. Yeah…”

“Here’s the question; what were you doing?”

Phil turned to Dan, and frowned. “This is what I mean when I say you don-, never mind. I told you, Dan, I thought you knew. We were doing Defence Against the Dark Arts.”

Dan nodded, forcing himself to commit that to memory. “Okay.” That was one thing off his chest, and following it, one question struck off from the myriad of others on his tongue. “Why?”

“Well, we had no other choice.” Phil paused, and then seemed to brace himself for the interjection. When none came, his shoulders seemed to relax, and he closed his eyes. “We were called the DA. That was short for Dumbledore’s Army.” Dan widened his eyes, and was about to exclaim about how stupid Dumbledore was if he was using students as soldiers, when he bit down hard on his lower lip. No, he couldn’t. Phil was _confiding_ in him. “Dumbledore had no idea of it, actually. No one did. We were a complete secret. Harry knew that Voldemort was back, and when that _toad_ wouldn’t teach us proper magic, he took matters into his own hands.”

Taking a deep breath to fill the silence, to test the waters, Dan decided that now was a good time to press on. This was okay. “So… he taught you?”

Phil visibly relaxed, pleased at his answer, and nodded. “Yeah. Jinxes, counter jinxes, defensive spells, hexes, the whole lot. I learned more from him in those few months than in the year since Professor Moody left. The day we got caught, we were learning the Patronus charm.”

Dan couldn’t help himself. “The Patronus charm? Phil, that’s really advanced magic, holy shit, could you even do it?”

Phil watched Dan, a frown forming, and shook his head. “N-Not a corporeal one. Only a misty shield version.”

“That’s amazing, bloody hell, I’ve always wanted to learn how to do a Patronus, would you teach me? That would be so- oh. Well, carry on.”

Phil’s frown faded, but his expression was blank. “Right. Well, we got taught all of these spells for months, ‘cause Umbridge wasn’t going to teach us. Besides, Harry told us everything, we knew what we were, no, we know what we are up against. We have to be prepared for what happens in the real world.”

Dan released a shaky breath. It was explicitly clear what Phil meant. “Because Voldemort was back, and no one knew, so you had to be prepared for attack.”

“No.” Phil stated. “We have to be prepared now. He’s out there, Dan. People are being killed now. Soon, that could be me.”

Dan shook his head. He refused to think about it, not Phil. Anything but Phil. “No, it won’t. You’re safe here, Phil. He’ll be caught.”

“It’s not that simple.” Phil groaned, and Dan couldn’t take his eyes off him. “Dan, how could you ever understand?”

“Phil-”

“No, Dan. I’m a Muggle-born. I’m in constant danger, now. I’ve been prejudiced against my entire school career, how the hell could you understand that? You’ve never experienced that. All I’ve known is this hate towards me. I just-” Phil looked out onto the lake, freezing.

Dan reached forward, his lip between his teeth, resisting the urge to defend himself. He placed his hand on Phil’s knee, imploring him to carry on.

Phil closed his eyes, not reacting to the touch. “I just know that every Wizard raised family I know has this same prejudice. I feel that every single one of them thinks I have dirty blood.”

Dan slumped, and retracted his hand. “That’s not true, though. I don’t.”

Phil shook his head. “You do. Of course you do. I mean… your family…your house. Everything you’ve known would make you think I’m an atrocity.”

“My family?” Dan whispered, now completely confused. “My parents know you’re a Muggle-born, though. They’ve always been accepting! Why are you accusing-” He stopped, and then backtracked himself in his thoughts.

Had Phil never disclosed to him before because Dan acted like that?

Phil’s eyes remained closed, as if he was suddenly afraid of looking at Dan. Dan wasn’t surprised, given the reaction he just had. Phil cowered from him, shuffling just an inch further away. “They try.” He said. “I know they do. Sometimes they say things, like they can’t believe how good at Charms I am despite of my background. As if… being Muggle-born means I’m not as good a wizard. Not a-” Phil opened his eyes slowly, and looked down at his hand. “Not a real wizard.”

Dan could see the visible transformation, watching as Phil let out all the pent-up frustration. “I mean, I know they don’t know any different, but god, do you know how much it _hurts_ to know that people think I can’t be good at magic, that I’m anything less than I actually am. I’m constantly demeaned, beaten down, reminded of my place. I can never escape it! Not even with the person who’s supposed to care for me despite everything. Not even with his family, his _grandfather_ , his parents.”

“Oh.” Dan breathed, looking out to the lake. He daren’t look at Phil, knowing that Phil would have a tear streak down his cheek. He ran a hand through his hair, and considered everything Phil had just said. “Oh Merlin. My grandfather too?.”

“Yeah, he said... I-I can’t… I can’t even begin to repeat them.” Phil sniffed. “After all that how was I not supposed to assume that…” Phil trailed off, biting his lip.

Dan slowly turned his eyes to Phil, his head following. He was lost, absolutely lost. What did his Grandfather tell him? “Yeah?” He implored. He thought he knew where Phil was going with it, but he needed to know. He needed to hear what could potentially be one of his worst fears.

“How could I not assume you had the same views on Muggle-borns?” Phil whispered, dead eyes staring out into the distance. “You were brought up on them. You must have been told how disgusting people think I am. How could you not think any less of me?”

Dan looked at Phil during that sudden revelation. “I-I’ve never thought you were disgusting.” He told Phil, trying not to wince at how Phil actually turned to him to look at him in complete shock. “I never have. I was brought up by my parents who told me to ignore blood status. They don’t mean to insult you. Actually, afterwards, I’m going to write them a letter, explaining how you feel. You don’t deserve to feel that way.”

Phil moved his hand up to scratch at the back of his neck awkwardly, gulping. “I appreciate that. I do get that they’re trying. They’re not the problem though.”

Dan looked towards the lake during the awkward silence that followed. A ripple emerged from towards the centre. Dan imagined the giant squid was moving again. When Phil didn’t speak, Dan piped up. “Yeah… I am, right?”

Phil paused, then gave a nod. “Yeah. You have internalised prejudices, you have to. You have to either believe I’m dirt, or you’re trying to get over it. I mean, with all the things your Grandfather taught you… It would be impossible for you not to. You know I’m right, Dan.”

“My Grandfather and I aren’t that close?” Dan replied. “I only ever see him occasionally, like Christmas or my birthday. Sometimes he pops in, but that’s all. I hardly speak to him. What do you mean the things my Grandfather taught me? He hasn’t told me anything.”

“Oh my god.” Phil whispered. “Oh my god. You don’t know. You have no idea. Dan, your Grandfather, the day I met him, told me that you would never willingly house a filthy mudblood, and that he had raised you better than that. Told me to stop deceiving you.”

Dan’s eyes widened, and he gulped. “O-oh… and you believed him?”

Phil nodded. “It just confirmed what I already thought. Then you came out from the kitchen, and you hardly spoke of me. When you did, you called me your ‘friend’, like you were ashamed of telling your Grandfather about our relationship. You seemed so excited before, then you changed your mind about telling him. As if you had realised how inferior I am.”

Dan moved closer to Phil, and placed his hand on the small of Phil’s back. “When I went to the kitchen, Phil, my mother told me that I shouldn’t tell him. That’s why I left in the first place. She told me he was _traditional_ , and I thought she meant _homophobic_. How was I to know, I never had told him I’m gay, so I didn’t. I never assumed that _this_ is what she meant. I was an idiot.”

Phil turned to Dan. “Oh… so you really had no idea?” A small smile was forming. “I- I was so afraid of telling you all about all this, in fear that you’d reveal how you really felt. And every time I gathered up the courage to, you’d well-” Phil trailed off.

Dan nodded, leaving a lengthy pause before continuing to talk. “I’d cut you off. Yeah, I’m getting that now. I’ve been… a twat. I understand completely why you wouldn’t, couldn’t, tell me all this before. You don’t have to hide anymore. I don’t think you’re any less of a wizard, or a person. Hell, you’re the best at Charms, and no one can compare to your Defence Against the Dark Arts skills. In fact, the last people that had called you _that_ ended up in the hospital wing for a week. Well, the last people I knew of, anyway.”

“That was you?! Oh my, what exactly did you do? You are so telling me later.” Phil smiled, and shuffled ever so slightly closer. Dan counted that as a victory. “There’s just, so much to explain. I can’t explain it all right now.”

Dan shrugged. “You don’t have to go in depth right now. You can tell me the rest whenever. I mean, we have a good lifetime ahead of us.”

Phil turned to Dan, and smiled a little wider. “Really? You- You actually mean that?”

Dan nodded, and smiled back. “Of course I do.” He smiled. “Nothing is ever going to keep me from you. That’s a promise.”

~~~

“My family… when I wrote home that I got into Slytherin house, my family… They wrote back saying that they were happy for me, but you know, I could tell even through the letter how, I don’t know, disappointed they were? Scared? Of me? For me?”

“My family was the complete opposite. I mean, my parents didn’t really care, but my grandfather, he was so overjoyed, or even just satisfied that I didn’t let down the entire family.” Dan sighs, looking up at the ceiling as if he could see through the stone straight to Phil. “I never understood how big of a deal it was. I never even stood by Phil when he- Merlin, what he must have thought of me.”

Tom has nothing to say to that.

As if psychic, Cat comes over and sits down by them, bringing conjured water bottles. “My family’s got some wizards,” she hums, “but my mum’s a Squib and my dad’s a muggle. I never felt like I belonged with either them or the rest of my family. Here, at Hogwarts, I found my own family.”

She crosses her legs, then uncrosses them and hugs her knees close. “Not just in my house, either. The friends I made on the train, who stuck by me despite our eventual sorting, the friends from classes, and everybody else who treated me like a real person, not different, not weird, they’re all my family. Now, my family is up there, fighting for their lives, and we’re here. There’s no use beating ourselves up over it, it’s just fact.”

Dan grabs a water bottle and manages an ironic smile despite the situation. He holds it up and looks both Tom and Cat in the eye. “To our family.”

They clink water bottles. “To our family.”


	6. Year 6: Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the Muggle-Born registration committee is in full swing, our Metamorphmagus does what he needs to do, and three Slytherins sit together in a cell.

~~~

The train to Hogwarts was tense, and Phil remained curled up against Dan’s side. They were in a compartment to themselves, and Phil’s eyes were screwed shut. Dan wasn’t faring much better, his breathing was uneven and erratic. Sixth year, Dumbledore was dead, and a month before this train journey, the Ministry had fallen to Voldemort.

That wasn’t the official version, however. People were told that Rufus Scrimgeour resigned and Pius Thicknesse was his replacement. Dan’s parents worked in the Ministry, however, so he knew the truth.

Attendance at Hogwarts was made compulsory for the first time.

The pair never held anything from the each other now, so Dan told Phil everything he knew. About his family having to pretend to be Blood Purists to escape the reign of the Ministry. Phil sighed and told Dan he understood why they were doing it, he did, but he expressed his horror about the fact they had to do it in the first place.

Neither of them knew why Phil was told to not go by his real name when he arrived.

Phil’s ear was right above Dan’s heartbeat, as if he was making sure it was still there. Dan was reminded of every single moment through their years together when their positions were reversed. Dan had confided everything in Phil, and he was always there to listen to every trivial complaint, to let Dan curl up on him until he felt better. He told Dan jokes and made him laugh when he thought he couldn’t possibly.

Phil had explained everything to him, and Dan was finally beginning to understand. The fears that they all faced, but especially the Muggle-borns. He told Dan everything about DA, about what everyone had told him about Slytherins, that they hated him. Told him about the bullying, what Dan’s grandfather told him, and why he had ever doubted Dan.

Everything they’d been through, it only made their relationship so much stronger now.

The train was practically silent; everyone bar the naive Muggle-born first years were not speaking. It was so different to the train rides they had experienced before. Truly, times had changed.

They held hands for the entire journey.

In Phil’s other hand was a bunched up copy of the Daily Prophet, announcing the newly appointed Muggle-born registration committee, dedicated to finding out how Muggle-borns had _stolen magical secrets_. When Phil first saw it, he had broken down, crying into Dan’s shoulder. Dan had slowly gotten better at comforting him these days, but it didn’t make the task any easier. He had no clue what to do. Muggle-borns were being rounded up as they sat there on the train, and Pure-blood Dan was clueless to the challenges they had to face.

They were practically marched off of the train when they arrived, but their grips were vice-like on each other’s hands. Their fingers were interlocked, unmoving. Phil stared straight ahead, dead on his feet. Dan side-eyed his boyfriend from time to time, but for the most part watched the ground in front of him.

The first years had been carted off somewhere, and the rest of the students began what they believed would be the walk to the carriages.

It wasn’t.

In front of the carriages, stood eight Death Eaters. Dan didn’t recognise any of them, but he frowned nonetheless. What was happening, what were they doing? He tightened his grip around Phil’s hand, and felt a nervous squeeze in reply.

“Split into your four houses now, for registration. Slytherin on the far left, then Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, and Gryffindor on the far right. Move it!” A gruff man spoke up, and then there was a cacophony of words. No one knew what was going on, but they did it, no questions asked.

Except Dan and Phil.

Phil tightened his hand on Dan’s and shook his head, willing him not to let go. The fear in Phil’s eyes almost compelled him to hold onto him forever, but the terrifying look of the Death Eaters, wands pointed at the ready to hex anyone who disobeyed, made him loosen his grip. “It’ll be fine.” He whispered. “No matter what happens. I love you.”

“I l-love you too.” Phil gulped, before turning to walk towards the Ravenclaw line. Dan dragged his feet towards his line, his eyes filling with tears at the thought of being separated.

Once the single file lines were formed, with no stragglers, every Death Eater asked the same question to every student. “Name and blood status?”

Dan froze, and glanced over at Phil - as to not make it obvious- and he could see the panicked look that rest upon his face. They met eyes, and Phil bit his lip. They were both pushed forward, and their eyes snapped to the front.

The Slytherins weren’t being faced with the rigorous interrogation every other house had to endure, so Dan ended up towards the front of the line sharply. The Death Eater looked at Dan and nodded. “Howell, I know who you are. Your parents work in the department of Magical Accidents and Catastrophes, yes?”

Dan nodded, and was let through. He watched as many of the Slytherins were placed on the carriages, but he stepped to the side to view the surroundings.

The other three lines were a lot slower than his house’s. In front of every line stood two Death Eaters, one doing the questioning whilst the other stood there intimidatingly. Some people were let through quickly, as he had been, and scurried to the carriages. Others had to receive questioning from the Death Eaters’ before being let through. Then there were the last group.

In front of Dan was a second year Hufflepuff with pigtails. She was frozen in front of the Death Eater that was interrogating her, asking about her parents. She was stammering, obviously confused, but when the admittal came that she was a Muggle-born witch, the Death Eater who had previously just been standing there grabbed her forcefully and escorted her away. She shrieked, but her efforts were futile.

The Death Eater returned a minute later, stuffing his wand back in his pocket. The questioning of the Hufflepuffs began again.

Dan gulped, watching this process happen again and again. Muggle-borns were being removed, most of them forcefully. In the corner he could see one Gryffindor fourth year that he knew first hand was a Muggle-born manage to lie flawlessly about his family tree. He managed to lie for his sister through the interrogation as well, and he held her hand the entire time to the carriages.

God, Dan thought, they were only getting through because of their knowledge of Death Eaters. How were those poor first years doing? On the train they just seemed so excited to experience wizarding life, something they would not experience now.

This was horrifying, watching them being rounded up like cattle, herded off to Azkaban no doubt. What would their parents think, these Muggles who would never know the prejudice their sons, daughters, their _children_ face?

They may never see their parents again.

He could hardly watch, and he almost turned away to get on the carriages when his thoughts returned to Phil.

Holy Merlin, _Phil._

He swiveled round, and when he couldn’t immediately see Phil’s distinctive black hair and pale skin, he panicked. They’d taken him. He never even got to say goodbye. Dan’s hands covered his mouth, before his eyes fell on the Ravenclaw line.

In front of the queue was a blonde girl who was in his Transfiguration class last year, as well as someone Phil knew from the DA last year. They didn’t even ask her questions, just dragged her away. Four people behind her, a brown haired boy who looked to be in fourth year stared at Dan. It was Phil, it had to be Phil. Holy crap, what was he doing?

The four people in front of Phil moved quickly, only one of them having to go through the questioning before being let through. Then it was Phil’s turn.

Dan was wringing his hands nervously, gawking at Phil. He was frightened for his life, Phil was his everything.

“What is your name and your blood status?”

“Henry Knight.” Phil stated. Dan’s heart leapt into his throat. Thank god for his parents’ warning. Phil had obviously prepared for this. “Halfblood.”

The Death Eater hummed. “Knight, hm?”

“Y-Yeah… My mum was a witch, Dad’s a Muggle.” Phil lied smoothly.

(Despite everything they kept from each other and the strain it put on their relationship, Dan was so glad that the secrets prepared Phil to lie so perfectly.)

“Right.” The Death Eater stepped closer. “And what does your Mum do?”

“She’s dead.” Phil stated plainly, and from Dan’s perspective it looked like he forced himself to look sad. It could easily fool the Death Eaters; they didn’t know Phil half as well as Dan did and they weren’t the brightest lot in the first place. “She died when I was seven, sorry. Dad told me her Wand backfired. You could probably ask the Department of Magical Accidents and Catastrophes about it.”

Dan gasped silently, knowing he would have to write a letter to his parents straight away. They would help, he knew they would.

The Death Eater gave a nod, and Dan hoped that the way she stepped back meant she was on the path to believing. “And what was her name?”

“Katherine Knight, I don’t know her maiden name, sorry.”

The Death Eater frowned at that, so Dan decided to take a little action, and moved forward towards the line. “Come on, Henry,” he waved. “I’m waiting!”

Phil nodded and rushed forward. The Death Eater let him; why would a Slytherin hang around with anything less than a Halfblood? This diminished every other question she had for Phil, and she turned to the next person. Dan had to cover his mouth in shock as they got into a carriage with a third year Hufflepuff who was crying. Her best friend had just been taken in front of her eyes.

They sat there in shock for a while, before Dan gulped and held Phil closer.

Phil let Dan wrap his arm around him. “When we get in I’m going to talk to Flitwick, explain to him what I have to do. I’m going to have to stay like this for a while, or find a place to hide.” He whispered into Dan’s shirt as the carriage began to move. “What are they going to do to them?”

“I have no idea. Azkaban probably, if they believe Muggle-borns have stolen magic.”

“Dan… I’m so scared.”

Dan looked around, and quickly pressed a kiss to Phil’s temple after checking there were no Death Eaters around. “Yeah… I’m scared for you too.”

~~~

“Could we possibly climb up the chimney?”

Tom looks at him. “You’re not serious.”

Dan shakes his head, “What if we break the window to the lake? Cast bubble head charms around everybody?”

“Right into the line of fire? Even the first years?”

“You’re not being much help right now!”

“Dan, you’re not even being rational right now.”

~~~

Weeks passed slowly, and Hogwarts had changed dramatically. The Carrows had been put into positions of teaching, and ever since the room for DADA had become a cover for torture. Muggle Studies was just lies about how detrimental Muggles were to wizarding life. Luckily, Dan didn’t take DADA for N.E.W.T level, but Muggle Studies had become compulsory. He hated the bullshit they spoke, and everyone knew just how stupid it was. Muggle Studies was enough for him to stop taking N.E.W.T.’s, but he didn’t because of his other subjects, having taken Herbology, Potions, Charms, and Astrology.

Phil couldn’t even attend class officially.

Phil’s appearance was now constantly changing, going from his Henry Knight persona, to the blond surfer type he used to be like when they was younger, to a red haired boy who looked like he was a fifth year and back again. He blended in with crowds so that it always looked like he was on free lessons, and he never got caught.

Professor Flitwick let them use his large office as a hide away so they could stay together, and all the Ravenclaws collectively snuck Phil into their common room at night.

Phil and Dan were closer than ever, uniting in the trying times. Sometimes when everything proved too much for the other, they distracted each other. Dan talked about his lessons, Phil talked about the occasional class he could sneak in to. They revelled in each other, cuddling close and holding each other without a care. They talked about memories they shared, the love they held.

Other times they vented.

The Muggle-born registration committee was just a sham to round up Muggle-borns and incarcerate them. After many were found, the wanted list came out, naming people who had been forced into hiding, on the run, or just dodging the law.

Phil’s name was on that list. When Dan was first given a copy, he burst into tears onto Cat’s shoulder. When he showed Phil, they both sobbed, and then held each other for the rest of the night. The third time he looked at it, he read it over and over again, counting the names again and again.

Phil was number 96 on the list. He checked five times.

A week into November and Phil was cracking, pummeling the walls in frustration. Dan had to cast the silencing charm on Flitwick’s office just so no one would hear his shouts. Other than that, he let Phil scream, before seeing the blood drip from his knuckles and finally pulling him in.

Another week later, and Dan was invited to visit the Carrows. Well, invited was the wrong word. He was forced to go see the Carrows. As a Slytherin Pure-blood, he had certain privileges, usually in the form of not (usually) being subjected to the Carrows’ torture and punishment methods.

He dreaded to think what he must have done to warrant this.

When he arrived, he was ushered into a chair. Amycus Carrow stared him down, his sister Alecto pouring something into a drink. Dan watched her out of the corner of his eye. The vial she had poured in was colourless, and after giving the air a subtle sniff Dan decided it was odourless too. It obviously wasn’t water though. His Potions knowledge came flooding back to him, thankful now that he was actually adept at the subject.

In this situation, there could only be one answer. Veritaserum.

He was about to be interrogated.

Amycus gave Dan a dark smile, as his sister handed Dan the drink. “Howell, how lovely to see you. Here, we took the liberty of preparing you your tea.”

Dan knew he couldn’t look suspicious, so he took the mug between his hands. “Thank you.” He mumbled. He then proceeded to take a sip, in reality just placing the mug to his closed lips. He eyed a bin next to him, and subtly moved it closer to him so it was right by his feet. He moved the mug back down so it was down by his lap and under the desk. Now that the mug was out of their line of sight, he very subtly poured a little out into the bin whilst looking around the office. “Nice place here.” He commented.

Amycus smirked. “Yes, it is, isn’t it? Drink up.” He enunciated, glancing at his sister happily.

Little did he know, Dan just repeated the same process. “Okay, Professor Carrow, I have no idea why I’m here.” Dan lied. He had to make it look like he was exclaiming everything everything he knew, telling the truth. This had to be the biggest scam he ever pulled.

“It has come to our attention,” Alecto piped up, “that you were friendly with the _Mudblood_ Philip Lester in your first few years. Despite attendance at Hogwarts being obligatory, he never arrived. We have been looking for him, but he has not been found yet. Anything you have to say?”

Dan withheld a cough, and shrugged. “Not really, actually.” He replied nonchalantly, trying not to show his anger at the slur.

Amycus frowned, so Dan made a show of taking another sip. “Are you telling us you don’t know where he is?”

Dan shook his head. “No.” He gave a small smile. “He went on the run, that’s all I know.” Dan admitted, for appearance’s sake. “Haven’t spoken to him since he left. We had a bit of a falling out, see, after Thicknesse came into power. I told him to just register with the Committee, I mean, nothing bad would have happened right? Just an interview.” He took a small pleasure in both their panicked faces. “He wasn’t convinced, so here I am.”

Amycus nodded. “Okay, okay. Where would he be?”

Dan shrugged again. “No idea, sorry I’m not being much of a help.”

Alecto placed her hands on the table, and she was so intimidating that Dan actually flinched back. “You come from a good Pureblood house, Howell, you don’t want to be associated with him or his kind. Our sources tell us you were a lot more friendly with him than you should be. Unless you want to be a Blood Traitor, I suggest you confess everything you know.”

Dan shook his head. “I’m so sorry. If I knew, I would tell you. I just want him safe, and I _know_ that he would be safer with the Committee, right?” He lied through his teeth. This was almost excruciating.

Amycus seemed to buy it, and he waved Dan away. “Thank you, Mr. Howell. I will be in touch when we find him so that you will know when he is _safe_.”

Amycus Carrow was not a good liar.

Dan nodded, subtly moved the bin back to its original position and placed the teacup back down on the desk. “Please do, I’d appreciate that. Thank you.”

And Dan walked out of the office.

He prowled slowly away, hands tucked in his pockets. He took his wand out of his pocket, and whispered “ _Cave inimicum_.” When nothing happened, he breathed a sigh of relief. He wasn’t being followed. In light of this, he practically ran to Flitwick’s office, wiping his eyes. When he slammed the door behind him, Phil jumped up from where he had been reading an advanced Charms textbook and walked over.

“Oh my god, Dan!” Phil gasped, running to him. “What happened? Where have you been?”

“The Carrows interrogated me.” Dan whispered, sitting down. “About you.”

Phil gulped, and his eyes widened. He sunk down next to Dan, gnawing on his lip. “Oh… w-what did you say?”

“Nothing. They tried to use Veritaserum but I didn’t drink it. I could never betray you like that.”

Phil curled up into Dan. “Thank god you did and all,” he said calmly.

Dan sighed. “Phil… they’re looking for you. I know my parents forged those documents for you, but if they look closely and find out that Henry Knight doesn’t exist, we’re screwed. I-I don’t think you should leave the office for a while.”

Phil looked at Dan incredulously. “Are you serious?” He cried.

“Completely.” Dan affirmed. His tone left no room for negotiation.

Phil had no choice but to agree.

~~~

A blood-curdling shriek pierces through the numbness of the dungeon. Followed by another. And another. And a laugh.

“Are they… getting closer?” Cat trembles.

Dan had no idea. 


	7. Year 6: Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which there's a problem and a plan and a solution in the past, and a problem and a plan and a solution in the present.

~~~

The oncoming of December brought with it a dynamic winter, alternating between snow flurries and mild spells. The temperatures soon approached freezing, and many students stayed inside instead of wrapping up and heading outside.

Phil felt trapped, having not left Flitwick’s office in just over a week. He slept in a storage cupboard, Flitwick having produced a mattress for him. He stayed in there all the time, either curled up on the mattress reading text books to catch up on classes or crying, sitting up when Professor Flitwick had brought him food, or cuddling with Dan -sometimes crying, sometimes not. He was crying a lot more. Lately, Phil had becoming more and more hysterical about the situation, desperate for a better life.

All he wanted was a life with Dan where they were safe, where there were no fears of persecution.

Last night, Dan had stayed with him in that cupboard. He had been up almost all night, cradling Phil in his arms as he cried himself to sleep. As Phil had practically collapsed with exhaustion, Dan stayed up. He let Phil lie on his lap, petting his hair. The thoughts buzzing around in his head didn’t allow him to sleep. Phil’s safety was in jeopardy, one wrong move and he could be caught. It was only out of the kindness of Professor Flitwick that he hadn’t been found a while ago.

This wasn’t fair.

So when Phil asked if he could venture outside, visit the lake for the first time in weeks, Dan was powerless to say no. He knew the room was suffocating for Phil, hell, at times it was even suffocating for him too. He knew that Phil needed to get out at some point.

Their breaths spiralled up in little wisps, and Phil procured a jar in which he could conjure bluebell flames. They sat pressed together, bundled up in woolen jumpers and scarves. Phil wore his Henry Knight persona; brown hair that curled up at the edges and grey eyes.

Dan reached for Phil’s hand. They sat there for a while not speaking, comfortable in just letting their fingers interlock.

Dan spoke up first. “You know I love you, right Phil?” He whispered.

Phil nodded too. “I love you too.” He whispered back. “No matter what.”

Dan ran his thumb over Phil’s knuckles, watching him silently. Phil’s head was on his shoulder, Dan’s cheek against his hair. Phil turned his head to kiss Dan’s cheek and Dan leaned in to kiss him properly.

It was a desperate reassurance. They lived for each other, and they both believed it.

“Well,” Amycus Carrow leered, “isn’t this touching.”

Dan and Phil snapped apart, whipping around as fear took over both their faces. Amycus was standing a few feet away with a deadly smirk on his face. They both stood up, grabbing their wands and turning to run away.

Alecto Carrow blocked their way. “Yesterday, we learned something from our sources that _somebody_ forgot to confide in us.” She sneered, glaring at Dan. “Did you know Philip Lester is, in fact, a Metamorphmagus? How he has come to acquire these powers as well as his magical abilities makes him extremely dangerous.”

Amycus stepped forward, his wand raised. “It also clued us into where he would be, due to his elusive powers of disguise. Our sources also claimed you were a lot closer than we thought, and we were just proved right. All we had to do was wait for you two to appear together. Alecto, grab him.”

Alecto grabbed Phil in a chokehold. As Phil used everything to get out of the hold, his disguise fell. Fearful blue eyes looked up at Dan, and adrenaline took over. “No! Let him go!” He gasped, trying to pull Phil out of the Death Eater’s arms.

Amycus flung him backwards, and Dan fell down, knocking over the fire jar. “Howell, I wouldn’t have pegged you to be a Blood Traitor, but here you are. I don’t know how you managed to overcome Veritaserum either. Let this be your final warning, don’t cross us again.”

Phil was screaming now, thrashing in the girl’s arms. “Dan! Dan, help me! Oh my god, help! Anybody!”

Dan paused, every ounce of self preservation he had kicking in. That was enough time for the two Death Eaters to start dragging Phil away. He kicked those thoughts aside, and stood up, aiming his wand. He started to flail after them, his eyes locking on Phil’s almost hopeful ones. They would not be separated. “That’s my boyfriend, you assholes!”

Alecto rolled her eyes. “We hoped you wouldn’t be difficult.” She raised her wand.

Dan pointed his wand at her. “ _Expelliarmus_!” He cried.

She blocked it, so Dan cast it again. It worked, her wand flying backwards. The distraction was enough for Phil to break free slightly. Dan looked determinedly at Phil, who looked nothing but afraid. He could hear the continuous whispered pleas of “I love you, please help me, Dan, I love you.” That was enough motivation for Dan to destroy an army.

He went to point his wand at Amycus, but he had gotten there first.

The last thing Dan remembered before everything went black was Phil’s horrified scream, Alecto’s cackling laugh, the warmth of the fire jar, and Amycus’ cry of “ _Stupefy_.”

*

Dan woke up in the Hospital Wing one day later.

He looked around, confused, at first not remembering where he was or what had occurred. Cat and Tom were sitting beside him. Cat looked completely panicked, as if not understanding what had happened. Tom just looked solemn.

Cat gasped when Dan woke up. “Dan! Dan, holy shit, what happened?” She exclaimed. “You didn’t show up for dinner yesterday, and when we went looking for you we found you passed out by the lake. You could have frozen if it wasn’t for the jar of fire we found by you. Tom had to carry you up.”

Dan stared at her, before something clicked. “Phil.” He whispered. “Oh my god, Phil. They have Phil!” He screeched, immediately trying to get out of the bed. Tom pushed him back down.

“Phil? Who has Phil? Phil hasn’t been seen all year.” Tom spoke gently.

Dan had never told them that Phil was hiding in Hogwarts.

“The Carrows.” Dan whispered, slumping down. Tears overflowed, and he began to sob. “P-Phil’s been h-h-here all year, he’s b-been h-hiding. He’s been-n that Ravenclaw Henry Kn-night I’ve been hanging-g out w-with all year. The C-Carrows found him-m-m, guys, he’s b-been captured.”

Cat gasped, and covered her mouth, and turned to Tom. She looked heartbroken for Dan, and tears welled in her eyes. “He’s going to be taken to Azkaban, isn’t he?” She whispered.

Tom just looked wide eyed at her, before he nodded. “Probably, but he hasn’t been taken yet.”

Dan turned to Tom, and stared at him. “What?” He cried, sitting up. “He’s still h-here? My boyfriend, now, my Phil?”

Tom gulped. “Promise you won’t freak out?”

Dan nodded without hesitation. “Tom, tell me.”

Tom drew out his sigh, before looking at Dan sympathetically. “School breaks up next week, so they’re going to take him out then. Until then… the Carrows have been ordered to use any means necessary to get him to talk and admit his secrets. I heard from Professor Slughorn that this happened, we just didn’t know it was Phil.”

Dan covered his mouth, and started to sob again. His Phil, tortured by the Carrows relentlessly. What had they done to him in the time Dan was unconscious?

“Oh Merlin! What do I do? They could kill him!” That thought alone was enough to make Dan retch.

Dan looked back at Cat, who had tightened her hands into fists. “We’re going to get him out. Come on, we’re Slytherins. Let’s use our cunning for a change.”

Dan turned to them both and he nodded. “I love him.” He whispered. That was the first time he had told Cat and Tom, and both their faces lit up. “I need him in my life.” He admitted again. “I need him safe. Let’s do this.”

*

They had come up with a plan. It was a very risky plan, but it was the best one they could come up with. They planned it thoroughly, not leaving any possibility vague. They needed to get Phil out of there, they could not fail. For it to work, it had to take place on the last day of term, meaning Phil was stuck with the Carrows for almost a week.

Dan would pass by the room all the time, and he could hear Phil’s screams. They were distinctive, piercing. Sometimes he would stand outside the room, trying to break in, but every time he found the door to be magically locked. Not even “ _Alohomora_.” would work on the door, he would know with the amount of times he tried.

Sometimes he would bang on the door, and luckily Phil would hear him. He could hear Phil calling for him, screaming his name. Then the Carrows cast another spell and the screams started for a different reason.

This was disgusting. First they teach that Muggles were like animals, stupid and dirty, and that they drove wizards into hiding by being vicious toward them, and how the natural order was being restored. Then they lied about Muggle-borns, saying they posed a threat to a peaceful society. Then they did this to undeserving wizards.

By the time the week ended, Dan was a mess. Almost continuously crying, he packed his stuff solemnly before waiting outside the entrance to the office. He hid in the cloisters, watching.

The sound of screams started again, and Dan could hear Phil pleading that he ‘didn’t steal anything,’ and that he was ‘a real wizard!’ Dan gulped, and nodded to Cat when she ran up. The plan had obviously been put in place. She banged on the door. “Professor! Professor!” She shouted.

It was Alecto that appeared, smiling sickly at Cat. “Ah, hello there. What is it?”

“Students down by the Great Hall have set off Dungbombs.” Cat replied, sounding like a member of the Inquisitorial Squad from two years ago. She probably had experience, being a Prefect. “And Peeves got a hold of a few too, now he’s by the Grand Staircase throwing them at first years. It’s getting out of hand really quickly, I thought I should come to you.”

This wasn’t actually a lie. Tom had gotten into the Dungbomb store and given a lot of them to Peeves. The situation worked out well for the both of them, Tom needed a distraction and Peeves wanted to fuck shit up. Tom had taken the rest and set them off in the Great Hall.

Alecto turned behind her. “Amycus, we have a problem. Follow me.” She growled at her brother, and they both ran out of the room. They had slammed the door shut, but when Cat pulled, it opened. It hadn’t magically locked itself. She turned to Dan and they both ran inside.

Phil was keeled over in the corner, gashes littering his skin. He was chained to the ground, crying silently. He looked barely conscious, and the tremors that had overtaken him were violent. He was alive, though, he was very much alive. At Dan’s sharp exhale, he looked up. The shock and happiness that bloomed over his face was enough to prompt Dan into running over. “Dan...Dan, oh god, you managed to get in.”

Dan nodded. “We caused a distraction.” He mumbled. “We don’t have a lot of time, you’re going to have to transform yourself.” Dan got his wand out, and non-verbally cast the severing charm.

Phil nodded, and slowly his hair started to lighten. “What’s going to happen now?” He whispered.

Dan propped Phil up, despite his whimpers. “You can’t come back to Hogwarts, you’re going to have to go on the run.” He replied, cupping Phil’s cheek. He watched as Phil turned his eyes to brown, and started to use his powers to change his skin colour. “We’re going to have to be apart for a little while.”

Phil shook his head. “No. No, Dan! I can’t leave you, I can’t do that.” Phil began to bawl, hugging Dan close. “Don’t make me leave you.”

Dan looked up to the ceiling. He hated everything, it felt like his insides had been strewn everywhere, and he was left completely empty. A void. Every possible deity that could exist; he prayed that not only would he and Phil be able to re-unite, but he also begged them to go fuck themselves. “For your own safety, Phil. You have to. You remember how to apparate, right? Professor Flitwick showed you, yeah?”

Phil winced as Dan’s arms tightened, but he nodded. “I do. I do. Oh god, I can’t do this. You’re my everything.”

“It won’t be forever, remember what I promised you?”

“Nothing would ever keep us apart.” Phil whispered. “I know. You told me that on the day you said you loved me for the first time.”

“I do.” Dan gave a sad smile. “With everything I have. This is going to be torture, but when Voldemort is defeated, we’ll be together again. I won’t stop feeling this way about you.”

“Me too.” Phil whispered. There was a shaky breath, and then Phil wiped his eyes. Phil’s cuts faded as he made himself look like a third year. “Okay. What do I need to do?”

~~~

“Has anybody even tried _Alohomora_?” A second year’s voice breaks through the hum.

“ _OH MY GOD_.” Dan nearly slaps himself for missing such an obvious solution.

It shouldn’t work, at least not usually. That’s the reason nobody’s tried it. Hogwarts’ magic is too strong for that, and Filch must have cast some sort of secret spell to vanish the door itself. But now, with the school’s internal web of magic damaged and everybody else preoccupied, using every bit of magic available to them, it could work.

A fourth year closest to the door eagerly shouts it, “ _Alohomora_!” and pushes against the brick wall with all her might.

Nothing happens. Filch must have placed an Anti- _Alohomora_ charm.

But her energy inspires all of them, and the older students stop theorizing with their heads in the ceiling and gather around the wall.

A seventh year starts it, firing a _Portabeto_ , sparks flying as it makes contact with the brick, but not splintering the lock from the door as it was meant to.

More unlocking charms are shot at the wall, _Annihilare, Dunamis, Emancipare, Liberare_. Dan could almost feel the collective ‘screw it’ as the spells cast shift to those of a more destructive nature. Shouts of _Reducto, Incendio, Defodio, Bombarda Maxima_ filled the room, anything to break down this barrier. The younger students join in, spelling out endless _Alohomora_ charms. Dan is middle of the cataclysm, his spells indistinct from the rest of the desperation, but he is there nonetheless, anything, _anything_. _Reducto, Reducto, REDUCTO!_

A shattering _BANG!_ sounds out so loud Dan actually looks behind him to see if the big window broke. (It hadn’t)

When he turns back, there’s a wall of dust and smoke in front of the students, and it clears with a whispered _Aguamenti_. The fresh water subdues the dust and Dan sees a gaping hole in the door, much, much larger than the door that had once existed there.

~~~

Two months passed quickly. It was February, Valentine’s Day, and Dan was alone. Dan had become a lot more withdrawn, practically spending all of his time in the library or curled up on his bed. A few of the other Slytherins mocked him, but Cat and Tom were nothing if not supportive.

Dan had no idea where Phil was, and he was constantly fearing for him.

_(“We have to get out of here, come on.” Cat whispered, interrupting the two. Simultaneously, they looked between Cat and themselves. Neither of them wanted to leave the other, but if Phil was going to avoid Azkaban, and possible extermination, they had to. It was just sinking into both of their heads._

_Bloody hell, how was Dan supposed to leave the love of his life?_

_They both nodded and ran out of the room and down the corridor. Cat lead them into an unused classroom. She took her bag off and practically threw clothes at Phil, clothes that Dan managed to acquire from a Ravenclaw in Phil’s dorm. However, there was a Slytherin tie instead of Phil’s usual Ravenclaw one. “Put that on.” She commanded._

_Cat immediately turned away, giving Phil his privacy._

_As Phil changed, Dan asked him about the torture he had endured. Phil told him without hesitation, knowing that Dan had heard most of it anyway. Dan started to cry at Phil’s words, helping Phil get dressed._

_It was too much to take in._

_When Phil was putting on his shoes, Tom ran in. “Okay, the plan succeeded.”_

_Dan nodded, and held Phil close. He knew what the next step was, and he didn’t want it to happen. “Phil, this is where we have to say goodbye.”_

_Phil shook his head hurriedly, clinging onto Dan. “No!” He shouted. “You can’t make me! I can’t leave you.”_

_“You have to.” Dan blubbered, wiping his eyes. “As soon as they found out you escaped, they’re going to come after me. If you’re with me at the time, they’ll know. So you’re going to go with Tom, and when we walk down to the carriages, you’re going to sneak away and apparate away. Don’t even tell me where you’re going, just in case they lace my drink with Veritaserum successfully.”_

_Phil was crying wildly, but he nodded his head in acceptance. “It won’t be forever, right?”_

_“Just until Voldemort is defeated.” Dan nodded._

_Then they were kissing, passionate and wild. Not of adoration, but of desperation. So that neither would forget what their lips tasted like, how they fitted together, how perfect the pressure was. When Dan pulled away, Phil had turned back to normal. His blue eyes were full of tears, and Dan wanted to kiss them away. The next kiss was a lot gentler._

_That kiss was one of goodbye._

_Phil pulled away that time. “You know what I’m about to say right? I’m really afraid to say it now, but I do, oh god, Dan… I do. No matter what.” He was rambling, transforming himself back. Dan was glad he got to see Phil’s own lips mutter those words one last time before they got separated._

_“Me too, Phil. For all my life. I...I’ll see you around.” Dan whispered, but it was then Tom started to lead Phil out of the room. He seemed to understand that if they didn’t leave now, they never would._

_Phil looked back at him hopelessly, eyes that should have been blue were brown, but were sullen all the same. “See you.” He managed to whisper, before he couldn’t see Dan anymore._

_“See you,” Dan whispered to the expanse of open air around him, before turning to fall into Cat’s arms. She hugged him tight, but soon lead him outside._

_Dan looked dead to the world, but by the time he got on the train his eyes were dry._

_Phil had to be okay.)_

He had absolutely no idea whether or not Phil was okay.

The Carrows had indeed gone after him, but they didn’t even bother to use Veritaserum. They had cornered him before the carriages left, and after Phil was nowhere to be found they had decreed him a run away.

They didn’t get to spend Christmas together.

Dan’s household was under surveillance, Dan having being branded as a Blood Traitor. His parents didn’t care, they knew their Blood Status protected them. The times were getting more and more difficult, to the point where Dan didn’t flinch when he received a detention from the Carrows. He didn’t care about anything anymore.

The Carrows cast the Cruciatus curse on him once before they decided it was futile, he didn’t even scream.

Valentine’s Day was wet and windy, a perfect reflection of his mood. His dead eyes stared straight down into the corridor. He was disheveled: shirt untucked, tie loose, robe forgotten. He couldn’t bring himself to make the effort. All he did was mindlessly move from classroom to classroom to common room.

Then that Gryffindor came along.

Dan didn’t know her, she couldn’t be anything more than a third year. She seemed to know him however, as she marched straight up to him. “We need to talk. Privately.”

Dan widened his eyes, before shaking his head. “No, thank you.” He whispered, before trying to move past her. He couldn’t talk to anyone, all he wanted to do was go to bed and cry again.

She didn’t give up however, shouting “You Slytherins are all the same.” She glared. This made Dan turn around and stare her down. She was unwavering. Dan made himself stand upright, making himself look intimidating. She cowered slightly, but otherwise stood just as straight as him.

“What do you want?” He deadpanned, not bothering to get angry. He was numb.

She looked around, knowing they were in an abandoned corridor. She gave a suffering sigh before turning to look at him. “Your boyfriend.” She stated, almost sneering the words. She didn’t believe what she was saying, evidently.

However, this sparked something unprecedented in Dan. He gasped, and crouched down, looking at her at full eye level with hope in his eyes. “Phil? You know where Phil is?” She seemed completely shocked by this sudden change. This frustrated Dan, and he grabbed her shoulders. “Do you know where he is?”

She gave a nod. “Yes. He’s with the DA now. He asked me to relay the message that he’s safe,” She seemed to take a lengthy pause, before spitting out, “and that he _loves_ you.”

Dan covered his mouth, removing his hands. “Oh thank M- wait, with the DA?” He whispered.

“Yes. They found a secret location that’s completely safe, as well as a hidden secret entrance. Phil and many other Muggle-borns arrived yesterday. They’re safe.”

“They’re here?!” Dan exclaimed with glee, smiling widely. “Please, take me to see him!” He laughed, his heart swelling with joy. He could dance, or jump, or hug this girl tightly, house rivalries be dam-

“No.” She said.

Dan paused. Then he shook his head. “You’re joking, right?”

“I’m not.” She replied. “It’s a secret location. We wouldn’t want anyone who could potentially sell us out to know. Who knows where your _Slytherin_ loyalties lie?” The girl hissed, swishing back her long brunette hair back.

Dan gasped. “Please, I need to see him. Can’t you take him out for me to see him?”

She merely shook her head again. “Too dangerous. And besides, why should we trust you? Who knows what lies you must have told to get him to fall for you. We’re not letting him leave. He just wanted me to let you know that he’s safe, told me that you were his boyfriend and that he loves you. Heaven knows why.” She smirked now, stepping backwards. “Bye.” She said plainly, before running off at a speed that Dan knew he wouldn’t be able to follow.

Dan stared wide eyed after her, before his face resolved into grave determination. He stormed over towards the Ravenclaw tower, hoping he would see the face he needed to see.

He did.

Luna Lovegood, in her Luna glory, skipping down the corridor as she always did.

This time, Dan blocked her path. She stared dreamily at him, but otherwise didn’t say anything.

Dan looked around again. No one was around. “You’re in the DA, aren’t you?” He asked, his voice almost pleading. “I know you are. Please, I need to see my boyfriend. Phil. You know Phil.” He rambled. “I need to see him, I need to!”

She looked almost lost in space, but placed her hand on his cheek. “Hm, I believe I know him. Changes his face quite a lot, but black hair more often than not?”

Dan nodded frantically. “Yes! Yes, oh god, that’s him. He’s really back?”

Her smile was soft, tucking a stray piece of hair behind her ear. “Yes, many people arrived yesterday.”

Dan grinned, before sighing. “He’s my boyfriend. Look, Luna, I need your help. I need to see him. How do I get to see him?”

Luna’s smile was almost wiped off her face. “Oh, I don’t know,” She breathed.

Dan let out a spectacularly loud groan. “Merlin! What the hell! Aren’t you his friend, don’t you know that he would be happier with me by his side? I need your help, Luna, you’re my only shot at being with him.”

“The others.” She exclaimed suddenly. “I would love to, but the others. They may not think bringing a Slytherin is the wisest idea. Personally, I would tell everyone to stop worrying. It only leaves you open to Wrackspurts.”

Dan had no patience for this today. He held her in place by her shoulders. “I. Need. To. See. Him. You have to let me!”

“Luna!”

Dan swore under his breath when he heard the shout, and widened his eyes when he saw none other than Neville Longbottom running down the corridor. “Luna! Are you okay, did he hurt you?”

Dan watched as Luna shook his head, before he turned his attention to Neville. “You’re part of the DA as well, aren’t you?”

He watched as flickers of emotions flew over Neville’s face. Confusion, fear, recognition, before settling on distrust. He took his wand out of his pocket just in case. “How do you know?”

Dan gave a laugh. “A little obvious. Just answer the question.”

There was silence, before Luna laughed. “He’s in charge of it, actually.”

Neville looked at Luna, completely shocked. Dan widened his eyes, before turning to Neville again. “Then you can help me!”

“Why would I help you?”

“My boyfriend!” He exclaimed. “Philip Lester. He’s a Muggle-born. They’re all telling me he’s here and he’s safe but _won’t let me fucking see him_. You’re in charge, please, just take me to him.”

Neville hummed. “Ah, Phil told me about you. Yes, he asked to see you but I told him he had to stay in hiding. I also got someone to send a message.”

“Yes, she was an asshole.” Dan cried. “Please just take him to me.”

“But you’re-”

“A Slytherin? Yes, I am. That doesn’t fucking mean I’m a Death Eater. Hell, I’m in _love_ with a Muggle-born, what part of that says I’m elitist, huh? I swear on my life, if you don’t take me to see him I will hex you right here, right now.”

“That’s convincing,” Neville huffed. “If I don’t take you to see him, would you sell the DA out?”

“No, because my _fucking boyfriend_ is with you!” Dan exclaimed. “Please, I’ve been worried sick.” Dan’s voice cracked, and a tear rolled down his cheek. “I have wanted to see him for weeks, I need to see him! Please.” Dan sniffed.

“You’re a Slytherin.” Neville scoffed. “I didn’t believe Phil when he said you were going out with him, let alone that he even _cared_ for you. What game were you even playing at?”

“I care for him. I do, I really do. Everyone knows that. Bloody hell, this is a joke. I’m just asking to see my boyfriend, he wants to see me too!”

“We can’t trust you.”

“You’re going to have to for once!”

Lun turned to Neville, placing her hand on the one that held his outstretched wand. “Neville.” She whispered. “I think we should. If he is lying, well, there’s always the Obliviate charm!” She said with her trademark Luna Lovegood giggle. This seemed to satiate Neville, who nodded pensively.

“Luna’s right, I don’t trust you Slytherins, but I am going to give you the benefit of the doubt for once in my life.” Neville grimaced at the very thought, but Dan’s face broke into a wide smile. He couldn’t help it, he hugged Neville tightly.

“Thank you!” He cried, and the shock of this rendered Neville speechless.

Luna had to drag Dan back from the hug. “Okay, let’s go, hm?”

Dan nodded, and followed the pair. Luna was skipping as usual, but Neville was practically stomping. Dan couldn’t care less, he was floating on the air. The hands that had been pressing down on his chest relieved some pressure, and he was happier than he had been in months.

They arrived on the fifth floor, and Dan had sudden memories of the door that had appeared when the DA ran from Umbridge and her Inquisitorial squad in their fourth year. It turned out that it was the same room they were to enter, as a large wooden door faded into view.

When Neville opened the door, Dan was shocked speechless. Hammocks and bedsheets covered every surface, and there was a roaring fire in a cosy fireplace. A large portrait of a girl hung above it, and there were stairs leading up to it, curiously enough. There were various students littered across the large room, one being that asshole Gryffindor girl who was glaring at him.

A boy towards the entrance noticed Dan, and gasped. “Neville!” He spoke in a strong Irish accent, looking at Dan in distress. “Why’ve you brought a Slytherin? Are you insane?!”

At that, the whole room fell silent. Dan stared around at a few faces, trying not to be hurt at the looks of pure hatred.

He told himself that he probably deserved it.

He swallowed, suddenly feeling very nervous. He tried not to listen to the hateful comments he could hear. Phil was here somewhere, that was all he needed to know.

He was eavesdropping in on a conversation about how Slytherin house were all evil fascists and how they were both so bemused that _Neville was stupid enough to bring a Slytherin_ when-

“What’s this about a Slytherin? Which Slythe- Dan?”

Across the room, stood Phil. He was skinny, a lot skinnier. He looked sallow and pale, but Dan could tell it was his natural skin colour. He was covered in dirt, and greasy all over. He probably hadn’t had a shower yet. Dan paid no heed, merely focusing on the smile that was blooming across his boyfriend’s face, and the fact that Phil was upright with no obvious injuries.

“Phil, you’re alive!” He exclaimed, before running to his boyfriend. Just seeing him got Dan to start crying again, and he could see the whole room look on in shock.

He was here, and he was healthy. That was all that mattered.

In the distance, he could hear Neville pipe up. If he was hearing it right, Neville sounded happy. He sounded like he was _smiling_. “That, Seamus, that’s why I brought him.”

Phil met him halfway, and for a while all they did was hug. They squeezed each other tightly, comfortable in just hearing the other person breathe for a while. Something felt a little off about the hug, but Dan ignored it. Then they pulled back, and let their eyes wander, recommitting every line, edge and curve to memory.

They were both crying silently, but Dan didn’t let that bother him. He went and cupped Phil’s cheek, wiping away the tears with his thumb. “You’re alive. You’re here, I’ve missed you so much I-mhm.” Dan was cut off by a peck on the lips, and Phil giggled when he pulled back.

“I’m here. I apparated to Hogsmeade as soon as I got the message off of the DA saying they had found the secret entrance. I’m safe, for now.” Phil whispered, before hugging Dan again. That off feeling returned. It wasn’t unpleasant, just alerting to Dan that something was different.

“Good.” Dan mumbled. “They weren’t going to let me see you, but Neville let me in, which,” Dan turned around to face Neville. Indeed, he was smiling. “I will forever be grateful for.”

Neville shrugged. “No problem. Just don’t show us that the trust we place in you by being here was misplaced.”

Dan nodded. “I would never. You got my boyfriend back, I can never repay you. Maybe I could sell out some things I hear people talking about in the Slytherin dorms? Would that allow me to stay here with Phil, so I’m not apart from him? I can’t go through this again, I’m never leaving him.”

Neville considered this. “We’ll talk about it later, but I see I made the wrong decision in keeping you two apart. The room will acquire to your needs, go, you have a lot to catch up on.”

Phil grinned and interlaced their fingers, leading Dan over to the corner of the room. There was a mattress on the floor, not unlike the one Phil slept on during his time in Flitwick’s office.

They curled up together, revelling in the company. Dan started to cry again at the feeling of Phil’s hair against his cheek, and Phil cried with him. For the the first time in a long time, they were happy.

They started to talk. Phil told Dan everything that had happened since his escape. He had hidden in the Muggle world, having found Colin and his brother Dennis. They had hidden in the depths of Manchester, posing as homeless kids as they went from shelter to shelter. They had a brief encounter with a Snatcher, but as Phil had turned 17 by this point, the trace was gone. He had managed to stun him and remove his memory. Dan talked about life at Hogwarts without Phil, the sheer torture that it was. He talked about the many detentions he had with the Carrows, about what they put him through. They cried again, and smiled again. And again. And again.

They were going to be okay.

(It wasn’t until later that Dan figured out what that odd feeling was. Phil had stood up to grab something off a shelf; it looked like a book. It was probably a book. Phil couldn’t reach it, even as he stood on his toes.

It was deja vu, Dan having to put no effort into grabbing the book from the high shelf. After realizing what had just happened, he started to laugh hysterically.

Phil pouted for the rest of the night.

In the two months they had been apart, Dan had grown to be taller once more.)


	8. The Battle of Hogwarts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which there's a battle, and a whole life passes before someone's eyes.

~~~

As soon as they get over their shock, which honestly, took no time at all, it was as if the wall was the glass window and the students were the lake, a tidal wave crashing through the break.

Dan isn’t actually in the front of the crowd surrounding the wall, and the hole, although large, isn’t actually big enough to fit 7 years of Slytherins through all at once. The first and second years behind him are as desperate to get out as he is.

Dan is shoved into Draco Malfoy in front of him and then pushed into the ground. A couple of small feet step on his back and crush his fingers before Tom pulls him up to his feet again. They push into the crowd, the wave catching them and bringing them forward, until they’re right at the hole and a scraggly edge catches Dan’s arm and then-

He’s free.

~~~

For the first time in days, Dan had put on his Hogwarts uniform. The date was the 2nd of May, and Headmaster Snape had called for a school wide meeting. They were all to go.

This wouldn’t have been so ominous if it wasn’t for Harry Potter and his two friends suddenly appearing.

The past two months had flown by. They spent almost every waking moment together, except for when Dan had to go to lessons to avoid suspicion. The room provided them with bathrooms and warmth, the passage to the Hog’s Head supplied them with food and drink; they had no reason to leave.

Now, Dan was scrambling to put his robes on, making himself look like a presentable Slytherin.

Phil looked up at Dan from where he was sitting on his -their- mattress, and smiled. “You look nervous, stop it. Nothing bad is going to happen.” He got up to smooth Dan’s tie, dust off his shoulders.

Dan rolled his eyes, “You don’t know that.” He sighed. “Snape knows that Harry was spotted. This could get dangerous quickly.” He gulped. “I think a battle’s about to break out.”

Phil watched Dan wide eyed, but didn’t say a word. “You’re right. My god, you’re right. You’ll stay safe, won’t you Dan? He pleaded, standing up to cling to his boyfriend.

Dan nodded. “Of course I will, I’ll come straight back here to you.” Dan smiled, pecking Phil’s cheek. A strange look crossed Phil’s features, and it made Dan frown. “And you’ll stay here?”

Phil gave a nod. “Yeah, of course.”

Dan didn’t notice the hesitance in Phil’s voice. He pulled on his robe, and grabbed his wand. He embraced Phil tightly, kissing his forehead. “I’ll be back soon, stay safe.”

Phil looked up at Dan, bit his lip, and nodded once again. “Go, or you’ll be late.”

Dan nodded, and with a peck on the lips he was off.

As he walked away with the rest of the group, he sighed longingly. He wished he could stay with Phil, but his absence would be noted. All the Muggle-borns stayed in the room, many bunching up together. Everyone else was walking out of the room. They all kept their distance from Dan. He still wasn’t technically supposed to be there, as the tapestries in the room only proudly displayed the badges of three of the four houses.

They were cold towards him in the beginning, but two months is a very long time to hold onto unwarranted distrust, especially towards a person you interacted with daily. They had begun to warm up to him, even offer him snacks. They still never let him in on plans, and a group meeting was a call for Dan to return to the Slytherin dorms, away from the volatile secrets. That was okay, though, Dan could live with that.

At least they now understood how the pair felt about each other.

As the door closed, and Dan rushed to his dorms so he could join his Housemates in marching to the Great Hall, Phil’s hair lightened significantly. A freckled face with determined features appeared, and green eyes looked almost tearful.

A wand was gripped in Phil’s hand. He was ready.

~~~

He breaks off, and starts to run. He can hear shouts behind him, the two ringing most clear are Cat and Tom’s pained cries. He ignores them; if he pays attention he would never be able to leave them. Random words flutter in: _safe, careful, die, Phil._

Merlin, he needs to get to Phil.

Adrenaline pumps through him as he sprints up the stairs two at a time.

_(“They’re moving staircases, Phil, be careful! Don’t double step, you could fall!”)_

He’s halfway up when he comes face to face with a Death Eater.

It’s almost instinctual, dodging the oncoming bought of green light by a hair. He manages to hide behind a cloister that had fallen onto the stairs. He gasps for his life, and casts the first spell that comes to mind without even thinking about it: a full body bind.

_(“Howell, what the hell are you doing?” Sneered Janus Grunnion. He stood before Dan, flanked by four other Slytherins and one Ravenclaw. Dan was alone, but it didn’t matter. He was the one who brought them here._

_He had found them all within the week. He talked to eyewitnesses, followed Phil even. It wasn’t hard. So he lured them all in and brought them to the lake._

_“You know, when you insult my friends, you cross a line.” Dan stated, slowly pulling his wand out of his pocket. He played with it in his hands, staring at the group. They all stared back, frowns forming on their faces._

_“What are you on about? Do you mean that Mu-”_

_“_ Petrificus Totalus _.” Dan replied, hitting Janus Grunnion straight in the chest. He toppled backwards, knocking down three other guys. This distraction proved to be enough for Dan to hex all the other members. Five more casts of_ Petrificus Totalus _erupted out of his wand. They all gasped, but remained motionless on the floor._

_Dan had no regrets._

_He stepped forward and snarled, “I know what you were about to say, and this is what’s come of it. Now listen up.” Dan growled, looking down at Janus’ face. “If I ever hear that you’ve hurt him again, I will not hesitate rip your eyeballs out and stuff them down your throat so you can watch as I tear your heart to pieces.”_

_Dan smirked, watching Janus’ face stare back up at him. He kicked him. “Fair is fair, I guess.” He laughed, and watched as bruises began to bloom on his skin. He moved around anti-clockwise, kicking every single member individually. Dan had wanted to do this for weeks, feeling the anger and the rage continuously burning under his skin. It was unpleasant, bubbling up in the most ferocious way._

_He left them there bleeding and bruised, unable to move, whilst he felt completely satiated.)_

Dan stays for a split second to watch the Death Eater topple backwards onto the floor, and then immediately leaps all the way up the stairs. He points his wand at the fallen Death Eater, quickly stunning those hateful eyes, before running off again.

He ends up in a ground floor corridor, helping a man with a scar running down his cheek and flaming ginger hair. The man doesn’t pay much attention to him, only blocking a curse that would have hit him. Dan returns the favour, covering him from attacks.

The corridor is ablaze with light. Red and orange flood the walls, the sudden flashes of green entwining into the cataclysm. Down at the end of the corridor is the entrance to the Great Hall. From what he could get out of the man, the dead lay there. He was trying to get there to check on his family. Dan needs to get there too. Phil could be -heaven forbid- there.

The Great Hall… could that really be Phil’s final resting place?

_(“Why do you never sit at the Slytherin table?” Phil asked, a warm April day in third year._

_“You’re my boyfriend!” Dan giggled. They had been together almost four months, and they were both completely happy. “I’m allowed to sit by you.”_

_“Why don’t you ever sit by people from your own house, though?” Phil queried. “Surely you have friends there?”_

_“Of course I do.” Dan giggled, and wrapped an arm around Phil. “I’d rather spend my time with you, though.”)_

Another green flash, and Dan casts his spell right back. The two spells collide, but Dan’s intent proves stronger. The Death Eater’s spell backfires, and he falls to the floor, chest unmoving.

It turns out the scarred man is a lot more adept at attacking than he is, so Dan quickly steps back and focuses on blocking oncoming attacks. Soon, they are running out of the corridor, stepping over the stunned and dead bodies.

The screams echoing throughout the castle are excruciating. There’s a sudden blast, and it seems like the whole castle shakes. It comes from upstairs, as if a whole side of the castle has been blown off. The noise ricochetes through the corridors, and dust billows up. He can hardly see.

They run into the Great Hall, and Dan gasps at the bodies that lay sprawled across the floor. He runs up and down the aisle, looking for-

His old DADA teacher, eyes closed. Dead.

_(“Mr. Howell and Mr. Lester, whilst I find your conversation on how to defeat dragons fascinating, please pay attention to the work on Red Caps that you were supposed to be doing.”)_

Phil would be heartbroken, he had always loved Professor Lupin.

Phil.

Where is Phil?

He sprints faster, but none of the bodies are Phil’s. From experience he knows that if Phil isn’t actively concentrating on looking a certain way, he won’t stay that way. That’s why he changes back to his usual self whilst asleep.

He isn’t here, so he isn’t dead. Yet.

Dan needs to find him.

_(“You know, I’ve never had someone before who makes me feel the way that you make me feel. You’re very important to me.”)_

Running out from the hall, and there’s chaos again. The portraits on either side of the fighters are screaming encouragements, whilst Death Eaters duel with students and teachers alike. From where he stands, he can see Acromantula try to make their way into the castle, and he shoots a couple of curses at them.

Then he turns, and comes across Seamus Finnigan. He’s duelling with a Death Eater, but his back is completely uncovered. A Death Eater from behind raises his wand, but Dan gets there first. A stunning spell later, and the Death Eater is unconscious. He uses this as leverage to help Seamus fight, and shortly the woman falls to the floor.

_(“Mum, what’s a Death Eater?”)_

Seamus turns to say ‘thank you’ to his mystery ally, but his face turns into shock when he sees Dan. “You got out of the Dungeon? You’re actually...fighting?”

Dan laughs, and shoots a Disarming Charm at another Death Eater, leaving him wide open to three Stunning spells. “Of course I am. This is my home too!”

He turns around to see if any more Death Eaters have arrived, only to see Professor McGonagall dueling with two simultaneously. She’s standing right next to him, and after a quick nod to Seamus, they both join in her fight. Dan manages to disarm them, as Seamus stuns and McGonagall blocks.

Dan turns, but there is no danger in immediate sight. He starts to run out, but McGonagall stops him.

_(“You acted like a true Gryffindor today.”)_

“You know,” She says gently. “I wouldn’t have pegged any Slytherins to step up and fight.”

This makes Dan’s blood simmer, and he looks up at her. “You know what? Just because I’m a Slytherin doesn’t mean I don’t know what’s wrong and what’s right. Evil isn’t necessarily one of our traits.

“Professor? You’ve always been wrong about us. I am not any less brave for being in my house. Fighting here, I am not any less a Slytherin. Fighting alongside your Gryffindors doesn’t make me one.”

McGonagall’s eyes widen, before she nods. Out of the corner of his eyes, he sees Seamus engaging another Death Eater. “You’re right.”

“I know I am.” Dan gives a deprecating laugh. “I’m going to fight for my school, Professor, and I’m going to fight for my family. Screw the houses.”

_(“Everyone here… they think I’m going to betray them. They look at me and all I can see is that hate. I understand it, I do. My house has hurt them all; from my house have come Death Eaters, and Blood Purists. That doesn’t mean I’m one too! That doesn’t mean Death Eaters and Fascists haven’t come from their houses. They think I’m a monster... That this whole relationship is one big scam. Phil, I’m not evil. My house does not define me.” Dan whispered as he lay his head on Phil’s chest. He ran his fingers in figure eight patterns on his boyfriend’s torso, sighing silently._

_Phil frowned. “I know it doesn’t. The stereotypes that are placed upon each house, they do nothing but harm people. You either adhere to the belief that you are your house and change yourself to fit accordingly, manage to fit it perfectly right from beginning, or be doomed to be outcasted. Take… Hufflepuff for example. They’re branded to be the dumb ones, the ones that don’t fit anywhere else. That’s not true though, because I know Hufflepuffs who excel in many of their classes. I also know Hufflepuffs who never even try, who just slack off. Why bother when everyone says you can’t?_

_Phil sighed, looking up to the ceiling, “And… and with Ravenclaw, people expect us to be these nerdy, bookish snobs, uptight about learning. One of our core traits is acceptance; we would never disregard people just because they aren’t conventionally smart. Luna is a prime example of that. The Gryffindors are made out to be the best, that because they’re brave and chivalrous, they can do no wrong. They can, though, their reckless attitude can hurt us all._

_“And Slytherin?” Phil turned to look into Dan’s eyes, “No one understands you, to the point where your House traits are ignored and you are just branded as evil. People don’t understand that they’re not put in Slytherin because they’re evil, but because they are ambitious. So many Death Eaters are ambitious, as you know. They have ambitions to rid the world of Muggle-borns. It sucks, but it’s still ambitious. You aren’t evil because of the house you’re put in, Dan, just as I’m not a massive geek. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.”_

_Dan looked up at Phil, leaning in to kiss the underside of his jaw. “You say that, but you just proved how wise you are, Mr. Ravenclaw.”_

_Dan deserved the small, gentle smack to the head he received.)_

McGonagall whirls around, and casts a hex that seems to turn someone into stone. Dan takes the next step and demolishes the statue with a quick “ _Reducto_.” Thank Merlin he’s had practice with that spell.

When she faces him next, it’s to start walking out to the Courtyard. “Then do so, Daniel, fight with us.”

Dan can’t help but smile.

All of a sudden, Dan ends up in a group of DA members. They all grin when they see him fighting, and gladly welcome him into the barricade.

But Ernie has no idea where Phil was.

Nor does Terry.

Or Dean. Or Seamus. Or that Gryffindor girl that he doesn’t like much.

They stay fighting as a group, covering each other. Ernie, at some point, joins another group, but the rest remain together. Two Hufflepuffs join them, and suddenly they’re stronger than ever.

_(“Phil! That’s the Hufflepuff table!”_

_“I know! I’ve heard they keep puffballs underneath their table!”_

_“Merlin help us all.”)_

Then there’s a blast, and Dan flies back through the air. The unmistakeable sound of duelling still permeates through the air, and Dan hangs onto that knowledge to reassure himself he’s still alive. He can hear the pained screams of his companions, but looking around, none seem dead.

He looks around and sees his wand: 11 and a half inches of Cherry and Phoenix feather, slightly smoking, a ruler’s length from his hand. He reaches for it and stands up. He sees that someone had cast a shield charm around them, protecting them for the time being. He almost throws up, shaky panicked breaths escaping him. He’s bleeding, he can feel the stickiness spreading across his face. He couldn’t rest though, he has to keep going. He manages to send two consecutive stunning spells at a Death Eater, before going to help Terry up.

He breaks off from the group soon after.

He’s so thankful that the DA had taught him curses and hexes in the months he spent with them, otherwise he wouldn’t be able to hold his own in battle.

_(“No, no. You’re holding the wand wrong.” Phil smiled, moving behind Dan to adjust his position, letting his hands wander over Dan’s chest. Dan leaned into him, tempted to just lead Phil back over to the mattress._

_Phil had been teaching him spells._

_He had gotten spells like_ Expelliarmus _and_ Petrificus Totalus _down, as well as an arsenal of hexes, but_ Stupefy _kept eluding him._

_Phil couldn’t help but giggling. He kissed just under Dan’s ear, before laughing again. “Concentrate. When you’ve got this, I’ll show you how to do the Patronus Charm.”_

_Dan turned his head to gape at him. “You will? Oh my god, that’s so great, thank you!”_

_“You’ve always wanted to learn, of course I’ll show you.” Phil corrected Dan’s position again. “Okay, go.”_

_“Okay, okay.” Dan paused, readying himself before he aimed at the second year Gryffindor who had volunteered himself to the task.)_

“ _STUPEFY_!” He shouts at a Death Eater who is too far to even engage him, but he doesn’t care. Getting to Phil is his main priority. He’s sprinting, sometimes tripping over rubble, sometimes his own feet.

The whole courtyard is on fire, and Dan watches as spells fly past him. He starts to run, head spinning. He narrowly dodges an attack, hiding behind fallen rubble. There are duellers everywhere, Death Eaters masked and unmasked are fighting with anyone. He can see Flitwick duelling with an unmasked Death Eater, a tall man with hard, blunt features and tied back blonde hair.

Dan goes to run a hand through his hair, his fingers come back stained with blood. He gulps, not knowing any charms to stop the bleeding. He takes a deep breath, steadies himself, before he looks out to the courtyard.

_(“Dan, seriously, why are you out here reading? It’s not even the nicer courtyard.”_

_“I was waiting for you to get out of Transfiguration.”_

_“Oh.”)_

He can’t see him. Why can’t he see him? Where is he?

Dan gets up, casts a body bind hex on a Death Eater who tries to stun him, before running back inside.

The corridor he’s in is practically abandoned. It’s actually surprisingly unnerving, and he stalks through it silently. He’s now approaching a spiralling staircase, and he starts to run up it. Once again, nothing is happening. Then he opened a door that led onto the Second floor and all hell broke loose.

He immediately had to dodge and avoid the curse that a Death Eater flung at him, but luckily he saw Neville Longbottom arrive with a Venomous Tentacula, which immediately reeled in the very same Death Eater. Dan started to run, casting spells at every Death Eater he saw.

They were keeping him from getting to Phil.

_(“Cat, I miss him. I miss him so much. I have no idea if he’s safe or not. I hope he’s still free It’s only been a month, Cat, but it feels like forever. Please help me, I feel so alone.”)_

He turns a corner, and freezes. There, slumped in the corner, is Eve. They had originally kept in contact after the Yule Ball, but they faded after she left Hogwarts last year. She looks almost the same, except her brown curls are limp against her back, and she’s crying openly. The tears leave streaks of cleanliness on her dust covered and grimy face. She must have come back to fight with the former pupils. She has a nasty gash on her cheek, but otherwise she looks like she didn’t need to go to the hospital in an emergency.

_(“Hi, I’m Eve, and this is my girlfriend Mary. Thank you so much for what you two are doing for us, and we’re glad it works out in all our favours. Phil seemed really excited to ask you.”_

_“Aw, did he?”_

_“Yeah! Oh look at him. No need to be embarrassed, Phil, you’ve gone red.”_

_“S-Shut up!”)_

His gaze begins to pan downwards.

Lying across her lap, blonde hair practically pink at the roots from the amount of blood flowing from the fatal head wound, glassy blue eyes staring into nothingness, is Mary. Her lips are not moving, and as Dan realises with belated horror, neither is her chest.

_(“He told us it was his first date, and he was so excited that it’s with you. He likes you, like, a lot. So please don’t let him down.”)_

She is dead.

A Death Eater comes barging round the corner, and the Stunning spell comes out of Dan’s wand without thinking. He runs over to Eve, and places his hand on her shoulder. “You can’t stay here.” Dan whispers. There would be time for mourning later, he thinks, this is not now. They need to get to safety.

Eve shakes her head. “No, I can’t live without her. I won’t live without her! She was the love of my life, how can I let her go?”

_(“No matter what, Phil.”)_

“There’s nothing you can do.” Dan breathes, his breath hitching on a sob. He tries to contain it, but the tear runs down his cheek unbidden. “What even happened?”

Eve holds Mary closer, hugging her lifeless body to her chest. Blood drips on the floor, the ominous noise, the monotonous tap filling the quiet that surrounds them. It should be louder, Dan thinks absentmindedly, it is louder. The battle hasn’t stopped for Mary, not really, but for them it may as well have. The noise just doesn’t matter right now. Eve is sobbing again, and Dan casts the _Protego_ charm around them.

“We d-d-dodged an attack from one of You Kn-now Who’s follower-rs, but the charm hit the tur-ur-ret. It broke off-f, hit her straight on-n the head. She d-died almost instantly-y. I… I got t-to say I love her one last-t time, hear her s-say it b-back-k a f-final time. She’s gone!” She screeches the last sentence, and Dan watches as she buries her face into Mary’s hair, not caring about the blood.

_(“Is that blood? Phil, I told you to stay away from the fanged geraniums!”)_

It’s Neville Longbottom who comes around the corner next, and Dan watches as he blanches. “Oh, oh god.” Neville is stammering. “We need to get her to the Great Hall, where the rest of the bodies are.”

Dan nods, and turns to Eve. “Eve, we have to go. W-We can’t stay here.” Tears roll down his cheeks, as he finally takes in the sight with a new perspective.

This potentially could be Phil and himself soon enough.

Eve shakes her head, holding Mary tighter. “No!” She screams. “I’m not leaving her!”

_(“I won’t let anything tear us apart.”)_

Neville crouches down by her. “We’re going to take her with us, to where she can rest peacefully, and you can stay with her. I’ll carry her, you and Dan can cover for us. Take out revenge.”

“Revenge.” She whispers, trying out the taste of the word on her tongue. She obviously likes the idea, as her eyes darken. They’re dull, completely dead. She looks possessed. She wipes away her tears and picks up her wand once more. She turns back to Mary and presses a chaste kiss to her forehead, and closes her eyes.

_(“What do you reckon the clouds are thinking?”)_

Eve looks almost in denial, like the thought of fighting the Death Eaters has completely obliterated the memory of her girlfriend perishing before her eyes. If it wasn’t for the head wound, Mary looks like she’s sleeping. Eve seems to relish in that, using that thought to preserve her own sanity. Dan won’t comment on it, however. He’d rather let her believe that now, than let her die with her girlfriend in this secluded corner.

_(“How could you ever understand?”)_

Neville moves her hands, and slowly picks Mary up. For Eve’s sake, he cradles her close, lets her head fall into the crook of his shoulder, as if he was taking her to bed, her blood mixing with his own. Dan helps Eve up, hugs her close for just a moment. She shakes her way out of his arms, as if not realising that he was trying to comfort her. She merely takes her wand, and starts to walk out of the corner.

Dan looks at Neville, who looks heartbroken for her. Mary is limp in his arms. Dan gives a small nod and they begin to follow Eve.

_(“Probably turns into a bat and terrorizes muggle children.”)_

The battle had not stopped, it was still in full swing. Eve was fighting off two Acromantula. Her wand movements were sloppy and aggressive, but the anger she put behind them was more than enough to make up for it. Her Severing charm was enough to cut through their flesh, bodies falling lifeless to the floor. Her Killing curse is more powerful than the Death Eater's own.

_(“Newt Scamander says there is potentially an entire colony of Acromantula in Scotland. We could be only minutes away from a five X rated beast. How cool is that?”)_

Dan joins her, hexing any Death Eater that dare come near them. He’s determined to get through this. He needs to find Phil. He’ll check the Great Hall again when he’s down there, otherwise, he’ll run around the castle searching for his boyfriend.

_(“I’m taller than you!”)_

They left the corridor soon afterwards, and they begin to walk down the Grand Staircase when Dan sees him.

Amycus Carrow.

Dan’s vision turns red, and he breaks formation to charge at him. Amycus notices him too late, and Dan has already cast the spell.

_(“PHIL! PHIL CAN YOU HEAR ME!” Dan was begging, slamming on the door. He was bawling his eyes out. Day one of being out of the Hospital Wing, and he could hear Phil being tortured loudly._

_“DAN!” He hears Phil shout. “DAN, HELP ME!”_

_“THE DOOR’S LOCKED!” Dan screeched in reply. He tries using_ Alohomora _again, but it doesn’t work._

_He hears Phil’s sobs, and Dan wants nothing more than to be on the other side of the door. Preferably in Phil’s arms. Or in Phil’s place._

_“Be quiet!” He hears Amycus’ sneering laugh. “_ Crucio _!”_

_“AH!” Phil’s tortured scream was enough for Dan to have perpetual nightmares.)_

He watches as the light erupts from his wand, a bullet aimed at Amycus’ heart. It was an off white colour, but it hit its mark. He watches in sick pleasure as Amycus rolls around in agony. The torture that he had inflicted upon Phil was now tried and tested upon himself. Dan almost wishes that his sister was here too. He would have the time of his life.

Sometimes, there is no doubt in his mind that he is a Slytherin.

He casts the spell again, his hand bunching up into a fist. “That’s for what you did to us, you asshole! We were happy together, you pulled us apart!”

_(“Phil! How is that even possible? You literally just punched yourself in the face!”_

_“I...I don’t even know! I- stop laughing!”)_

The screams he hears from him are almost delectable. He could probably listen to it for hours. He instinctively dodges a curse shot at him and goes to cast it again when he hears the screams die down, but someone drags him away. He almost jabs his wand out at the person, but he turns to find Ginny Weasley. She shakes her hair, ginger strands falling out of her messy ponytail. “It’s not worth it.”

_(“Fine. Go to the Quidditch match, then.”)_

Dan shakes his head. “It is. For all he put me and Phil through, it very much is.”

Ginny looks at Dan through tired, red rimmed eyes. “I know. My brother’s dead, and in a minute I’m going to curse the _fuck_ out of him. Right now, you have a boyfriend you need to find.”

Dan widens his eyes at her. “Have you seen him? I have no idea where to look.”

_(“Do you know any spells yet? I haven’t tried any from the books.”_

_“My mum taught me how to make bread, but that’s about it.”)_

“I last saw him half an hour ago.” Ginny announces. Dan’s heart starts to flutter. Maybe there is a chance that he’s still alive! “He heard that the Slytherins had gotten out, and was looking for you. Many of the Slytherins were evacuated to safety, a few stayed to fight; some for our side and some for Voldemort’s. He had a feeling you stayed.”

_(“Wait ‘til I show you what the Internet is. There’s this new thing called Google.”)_

Dan smiles at that. Phil finally put trust in him, believed that he would go through Fiendfyre for him. He would, of course he would. They’d finally reached the point where they put the utmost trust in one another.

It’s a good feeling.

_(“He’s out there, Dan. People are being killed now. Soon, that could be me.”)_

Eve was fluttering about on the stairs, casting enchantments on any Death Eater that crossed her path. She was relentless, flinging away people, a stony look perched on her face. Dan turned to Ginny, and nodded. “Help us get to the Great Hall?”

She nods, and they began on their path. With Eve’s anger, Dan’s precision and Ginny’s talent, no Death Eater stood a chance against them. Neville raced after them, flinging out warnings as they ran down the Grand Staircase. (“Over there!” “Watch out, he’s a Death Eater!” “DUCK, DAN, YOU MORON!”)

_(“You’ve got to be more careful, Dan. Do I need to teach you how to use a teacup?”)_

Dan gulps as he enters the Grand Hall. This was a place where they had come to eat daily, now he’s unsure whether or not he could ever stomach food here again. There’s an extra two rows of bodies lining the hall now. The sound of crying pierces through the atmosphere, leaving gashes in hearts that mirror the gashes left in flesh.

_(“How can you possibly not like cheese?”)_

It’s here where Eve breaks down again. The remembrance of her girlfriend is plain to see on her face, and when Neville gently lays Mary down, she cracks. Fresh tears spill down her face as she grips Mary’s hand and begs her desperately -fruitlessly- to wake up.

Dan steps back, and wipes his eyes. He can’t do this, he can’t watch this.

He leaves her to wallow in pain alone, Neville and Ginny already having run off to fight again.

_(“I don’t understand this movie.”_

_“I don’t care. I am the Lion King!”)_

It’s as he walks out into the entrance hall that he spots him.

There he is, on the edge of the courtyard opposite to the one Dan was _just_ fighting in. He’s bloody, bruised, and battered, but honestly, who isn’t at this point? All that matters is that Phil is alive.

He’s engaged in a deadly battle with a seventh year Slytherin -who had joined the fight for the other side- yelling slurs at him.

Phil blocks the offensive words just as he does the oncoming spells. Phrases that once would have cut him to the bone now bounce off his defense. He’s so much stronger, braver- no. He’s always been this way, only Dan had never looked to see it, to unlock it, until now.

_(“I… I never understood before.” Dan whispered. Phil had confessed everything to him, so much that he couldn’t even begin to describe it back. “I was brought up by two Wizarding parents, I never knew how much prejudice you face every day. I was blind to it, no, I just didn’t want to see it. I think so highly of you, Phil, I think you’re perfect. It baffles me to think that anyone else could think otherwise.”_

_Phil gave a small smile. “I’m actually… really glad we’re having this conversation. I just, assumed so much. Because of your house, I was ignorant to how you really felt about people like me. Not to say I thought you were horrible, I always just thought I was this sham. This phase.”_

_“You would never be just a phase.” Dan whispered, his hand firmly placed on Phil’s knee. “I know you haven’t explained everything to me, I know, but you can tell me whenever you want.”_

_“Dan, seriously, thank you. For being so understanding. I can see it so clearly now,_  
_people who say that all Slytherin are bad just have never met you.”)_

Dan was running before he knew it.

In a flash, his wand arm is outstretched and ready, and he’s sprinting towards him. He can see the sparks of red and green that bounce off of debris as they dodge. Phil is brutal, his duelling skills amazing. He has perfect posture, technique and accuracy that can kill, and the emotion put behind it could not to be matched. He watches as Phil manages to block an attack, and then his friend Colin, -who must have stayed with Phil throughout the entire battle, he would have to thank him later- is running over to go on the offensive.

_(“Ooh, I like this Internet thing.”)_

Then the ground froze over.

_(“Phil,” Dan laughed, “There are no monsters under the bed.”)_

Both the Slytherin and the two combatants freeze in their positions. Even Dan has to slow his pace as tremors overtake him. They turn collectively, and come face to face with twenty dementors, all heading towards Phil and Colin.

_(“It’s not working, Phil, how do I do it?”_

_“You need the happiest thought in the entire world. You need the happiness to be overwhelming, to get rid of all the negativity that they’ll give you. Try again, Dan.”)_

Dan couldn’t comprehend it, but he was running again. His feet were moving of their own accord, and he sprinted past Colin, past Phil, towards the Dementors. His wand outstretched, posture as good as he could make it.

“ _Expecto Patronum_!”

_(“That’s… incredibly sweet of you to say, Phil.” Dan giggled, his hand moving from Phil’s knee to the back of his neck. “I really do think you’re incredible. You’ve faced all this adversity and never became bitter. Sure, you hid some stuff from me, but you had your reasons._

_“I’m just… so lucky, to have you as part of my life. From the day I met you, we’ve been inseparable, and I knew back then how much you were going to mean to me. We’ve had our few shares of problems, and I know that with You Know Who out there, times aren’t going to get much better. But… we’ll make through it. We’re fighters, you and me. I’m constantly battling the prejudice against my house, and you’re facing the prejudice against your blood status. We’ve got though this far, we’ve survived one hundred percent of our encounters. The love I have for you is never going to fade, Phil, through thick or thin. No matter what happens now, what we may face in the future. We’ll get through it side by side. Like I said, nothing will ever keep me from you. Right?”_

_Phil was frozen, looking at Dan in astonishment. “L-Love?”_

_Dan bit his lip, backtracked through his head, before groaning. “Yeah, love, shit… did not mean to tell you it like that.”_

_“You love me?” Phil questioned, immediately bringing Dan’s hands into his own and searching his eyes. “Please, do you love me?”_

_Dan couldn’t hide this, this was something he couldn’t shy away from. “Yes, of course I do. I love you. How could I not?”_

_Phil’s face broke out into a silly grin, and Dan’s heart was pounding so hard against his ribcage that he thought he might break. “I love you too.” Phil breathed._

_“What?” Dan asked, incredulously._

_“I love you too! Practically since that first kiss. Oh god, Dan, I love you. I really love you.”_

_Dan couldn’t reply, couldn’t fathom words. (What even were words? In this moment floating in time, were there any other words apart from ‘I’ and ‘love’ and ‘you’?) Instead, he leaned in to kiss Phil properly, mouths colliding against each other. And again. And again_

_The circumstances weren’t perfect, but no, they wouldn’t change them for the world as long as they had one another.)_

A silver stream of light sparks from Dan’s wand. It flows outwards, almost bouncing. He concentrates on Phil, on how his lips connects with his own, the melodic tone that Phil uses when he says ‘I love you’, Phil’s smile, Phil’s eyes, Phil’s heart.

The flow of light is a flow no longer; it’s a picture, no, it’s a wolf. It’s not the size of a pack leader but it’s slender, with long legs. It runs at the dementors so fast they don’t have time to flee and nearly dissolve at the contact. Dan catches just one more glimpse of its bared snout and long teeth before it dissipates.

Dan just cast a corporeal patronus.

He turns to Phil, who is standing quite a few feet away, Colin next to him. Phil is staring incredulously at him, before he begins to grin.

“I… I just did it.” Dan laughed, beginning to walk to Phil. “I thought of you, and I did it.”

Phil grin widens impossibly so, but remains rooted. Colin begins to move back, going to give them some privacy, as well as to cover for them. “You came to fight. I knew you would. People told me that I was crazy to think so, that you would abandon me, but I knew you would come. You promised me, you promised me that nothing would ever keep us apart.”

Dan nods, and carries on walking forward. “I did. I told the truth Phil, not even Dementors could do that to us.”

Colin is blocking his way slightly as he backed up, so Dan moved around to the left ever so slightly. It was then he spots it.

The Slytherin that Phil had been dueling had recovered from his shock, and his outstretched arm allowed him to aim his wand right at Phil. Phil’s back was turned, he couldn’t see him.

Dan gasps, and runs forward. Phil’s face spells out confusion, seeming to think Dan’s coming to hug him, when in reality Dan merely grabs his collar and pulls him down to the left. They narrowly avoid the beam of green light that shoots over their heads, and Dan flicks his wand, managing to send a perfectly cast stunning spell at the Slytherin.

Dan sighs in relief when he’s down, and this time actually goes to hug Phil, when there’s a bloodcurdling scream from behind them.

_“Colin!”_

Phil is immediately out of his arms, and running towards the boy in question.

It’s when Dan turns around that he sees what he’s done.

Colin Creevey looks up to the night sky with unseeing eyes, a flicker of a fond smile etched upon his final resting face. Dead from the killing curse that Dan and Phil had just dodged.

It had hit him straight in the chest.

~~~

Dan and Phil were fighters. Nothing more, nothing less. Throughout their lives they faced challenges, problems. Prejudices that weren’t easily erased away.

No matter what they faced, they overcame it, and always came home to one another at the end of the day.

They were survivors.

They pick themselves up from the floor, watching as someone carries Colin to the Great Hall. They're crying, but they carry on. They've always just had to carry on. The time for mourning would come. They turn around, holding hands, wands already outstretched, ready to face the next challenge together. 

Dan had broken from a prison to stand by Phil, Phil had survived a battle by himself to be with Dan again. 

It was just like that old promise: Nothing could ever keep them from one another.

Not even a battle.


	9. Acknowledgements

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the author has a few things to say

A/N: Well, what can i say? First of all, thank you to my amazing beta Louise/Jade (still have no idea which one) who was absolutely fab through this whole thing. From editing tenses, to calming me from an anxiety attack when AO3 wouldn't work for me to get this up on time, to helping me with the Dungeon scenes and just putting in random quotes.

You know that flashback where Phil punches himself in the face? That's because i did so whilst writing, and when telling her this she immediately put it in.

So thank you! You've been so incredible, and I can't wait to write some more with you.

Secondly, thank you to Megan who supplied the art for this fic, which can be found here:

[ http://thatonenerdwhofangirls.tumblr.com/post/130512153062/pensieve-art-by-magical-octopus-theyre](http://thatonenerdwhofangirls.tumblr.com/post/130512153062/pensieve-art-by-magical-octopus-theyre)

not only did she do one drawing, she did four! they're so cute and i love them so much aaah :)

 

please leave kudos or a comment if you liked it! this is the first fanfiction ive ever properly wrote, so the support would be lovely

 

also, comment if you want a sequel. or a part from phil's POV. 

 

thank you all <33


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